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More Hate Mail From the Republican Elite

Saturday, May 29, 1999

Kristopher & Tracy Godwin (tgodwin@fni.com) write:

    DEAR MORON,

    You sir are a childish little man who would not make a good size pimple on Ronnies [sic] ass. So to take it down to your level should we start to play the blame game and start to blame democrap [sic] presidents down back to the begining of time? You cannot defend your skirt chaser so you bash the greatest man to ever lead this country. Well it may be sad for you but the American people are waking up to the smoke and mirrors act. You and all your bunny humping grass sucking peace pipers,( who have KILLED more citizens and less military targets than ANY ANY ANY ,"leader", of ALL TIME), WILL BE IN A SAD STATE IN 2000. May you choke on the dust of George W. Bush.

    I just hope he has enough time in eight years to clean up after you greasy little weasels. So as you lay in bed tonight just think for first time FIRST time since Ron ended the cold war,  you now have nuclear warheads on rockets aimed at my country, and your boy billy sold them to the yellow bastards. So sleep tight, I know clinton [sic] will, on a bed of chinese [sic] cash.

Dear Kris & Tracy:

Actually I a mature, very big man -- I weigh 220 stark naked.

One might well suppose, Tracy, that you have extensive knowledge about Ronnie's puss-encrusted buttocks from personal experience servicing him and his campaign.

We "Democraps," however, think people like you should be the focus of our attention -- and the nation's.

Therefore your letter, and this answer, will be published -- along with your email address, so that the 17 million or so readers that enjoy our "bashing" of "the greatest man to ever lead this country" can contact for themselves people with "high" IQs enjoyed by "good" Republicans such as yourselves.

Actually, we defend our "skirt chaser" quite well, don't you think? And it doesn't take smoke and mirrors.

By the way, "bunny humping grass sucking peace pipers" should have at least one comma and two hyphens.

We are sorry to have KILLED so many citizens -- but then what can we do? We are communist revolutionaries following in the steps of FDR, JFK, LBJ and Jimmy Carter!

We assume you mean "angel dust" when praying that we choke on BushBaby's "dust." Those of us here who partied with him in earlier years, must say he really knows how to light one mean crack pipe!

As we lay in bed last night, the following thought crossed our minds for the first time since Ron "ended" the Cold War -- by nearly bankrupting the world and taxing us into oblivion:

    Hey! We still have nuclear "rockets" aimed at "your" country -- and our boy Billy sold them to "The Yellow Bastards." Woe is us!
Kind of has a ring to it, doesn't it?

As we were counting the Chinese Cash stuffed into our mattressess, we thought of you, Kris and Tracy -- and your pickup with the shotgun on the rear window, your crosses and cans of gasoline in the back of the truck next to those pre-tied nooses, your absolute ignorance and lack of education.

And we wept, not only for you, but for your children -- innocents that might be taught by deceitful little weasels like both of you, who represent such an infinitesimally small group of bigoted lunatics with fifth-grade educations so desperate to murder anyone who disagrees with what Rush Limbaugh and Chris Matthews tell you to believe.

As you both sit on on the dirt in front of your trailer, sipping beer through your filthy decayed teeth and farting out those TV dinners in front of Vanna White on "Wheel" and chatting about the good ole' days when the KKK could parade proudly down the streets, think about this:

You are dinosaurs clinging to the dream of becoming rich like the men you worship while you sit there in Jurassic Trailer Park.

But guess what?

It will never happen. Because those men -- you know, the ones who run the GOP? -- don't care about your lack of education, your paltry knowledge of what's real, or quality health care for you when you overdose.

They do care, however, that you have a low paying job so they don't have to pay for those beers.

Think about that tonight.

And, oh -- by the way -- It Was BushBaby's father that sold those missiles to the People's Republic of China.

But don't worry. The Cox Report found no evidence that China had a single warhead aimed at the USA -- "your" country.

Best Regards

Mac MacArthur


Click here for Mac MacArthur's previous commentary in American Politics Journal.

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ISSN No. 1523-1690