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by Mac MacArthur

Thursday, August 12, 1999 -- AMES, IOWA -- Here I am in Iowa again -- this time six months before the Iowa Caucuses (see Iowa Caucuses 1996 in the APJ Archives) and a few days before their dumb "Straw Poll."

I am in Indianola, a place best known for hot air balloons, urine-yellow clapboard houses and extremely fat hirsute women in stretch pants. One wouldn't know there was a drought here -- it certainly hasn't been accompanied by famine!

Iowa is the land of ethanol.  Iowans are so naive that they think Archer Daniels Midland (ADM) won't screw them on corn prices to feed its giant ethanol plants in Decatur, Illinois.  I mention ethanol only because every single candidate on both sides of the aisle supports ethanol tax breaks... for ADM, not the farmers that grow that feedstock corn.  Put simply, ADM gets to choose tax credits or tax breaks for production of ethanol -- tax credits so large that the cost of the ethanol for the giant agri-processor is about zero.  As a matter of fact, sources tell me that the entire bottom line profit for Dwayne Andreas's "Disneyland for Cornponers" is tax money you pay ADM to produce their famous gasoline additive. If you wonder why Bob Dole had free use of ADM's fleet of jet aircraft, you should read Dole's speeches pleading with Congress to sustain the tax breaks for Andreas.  And his wife Elizabeth is keeping true to the big lie -- as a matter of fact, the Doles spend part of the winter in their luxury condo in Florida, The Sea View -- brought to them by ADM, "SuperBank to the Congress," and built by Dwayne Andreas so he could offer luxury digs at rock-bottom prices to his friends, a virtual who's who of ex-Senators, Washington lobbyists and even that old sod David Brinkley who sold his journalistic soul to Andreas for the price of a few Aston Martins.

Iowans pretend to know a lot about politics -- but in truth they don't know manure. They, like most Americans, get their information from CNN, ABC, NBC, and CBS, and most of them are already convinced that George "DumbBellYou" Bush will be the GOP nominee.

However, watch for them to vote for someone else -- just to keep BushBaby in line.

Let's talk about the Straw Poll.  In a place like Iowa, the name Straw Poll is apt.  You can always find piles of straw in the myriad fields of this "Wizard of Oz" setting.

Steve Forbes schmoozes with a corn-fed crowd in Burlington, Iowa.

A friend and well-known actress once told me, "Iowa is a place you want to leave real bad -- that is, until you live in Mexico."

I've spent the last few days sitting in one ultra-clean but ultra-ugly coffee shop listening to political conversations that my three-year-old could have with his friends -- and adding my own two cents when invited.  I chatted with two Iowans -- Mort and Clyde (yes, those are their real names) -- who assured me they were going to pay up, buy a ticket, and vote in Saturday's Straw Poll in Ames to show the nation the "strength" of the hand-picked "corn-didates."

Morton was an ardent Dole supporter and told me with a nudge and a smile that Elizabeth Dole had "great t*ts" and looked like a "honey."  Clyde, a banker, was for Bush.  He claimed that George Jr. was, despite his arrogance, the only Republican who can beat Al Gore "hands down."  And Clyde didn't care if young George was a coke-snorter.  "Heck," he said, "most of the kids in Iowa snort just to keep awake!"

I agreed with Clyde -- on both points.  Bush is the only Republican that has a shot at beating Gore, but Clyde has no idea why -- he "just heard it" on CNN.  As I was nodding in agreement, I can swear I saw two girls about sixteen years of age sitting at a table in the back of the cafe snorting something through a straw.  They seemed not to have pupils.

I have had a hard time finding details on just how the Iowa Straw Poll works.  Some say it's merely a show of money.  Candidates pay the way for voters willing to show up at the Straw Poll and cast their votes for him -- or, in the case of Ms. Dole, for her.

But the truth is that a lot of "street money" changes hands - making the "Straw Poll" more reminiscent of New Jersey or Brooklyn politics than one might imagine in Iowa.  "Street money" is a nice name for bribery: pay the voter anywhere from $5 to $25 to show up and vote your way.  Judging by the total vote cast in the Iowa Straw Poll last time, one might need only spend a few million to win.

Now, we know that Steve Forbes can afford to bribe anyone, and George Bush Jr. is practically in the same boat -- or should I say "yacht?"  But I found only one fellow who claimed he was offered a bribe -- and believe it or not it was from someone claiming to be from the Gary Bauer camp.

Speaking of Gary Bauer, don't be foolish enough to count him out... at least in Iowa.  Bauer, who is running for President simply to cement his chances to raise his speaking engagement fees from $50 to $500, is certainly not a candidate that anyone with their sanity intact would consider electing to the presidency.  But in Iowa, there are a lot of insane people -- bored into early Alzheimer's or premature senility.  Bauer is ranking high in the polls and the little Neo-Nazi isn't missing a trick -- visiting as many Bible-thumping, tongue-speaking, rattler-rustling "true believers" on the floor as he can, visiting churches to spew his hatred for homosexuals, girls who don't want babies, and women who would rather work than raise their children on a full-time basis.

Alan Keyes, the only African-American besides "O.J." Watts who had considered running for President this cycle, draws crowds of Iowans everywhere he goes.  They all ask him if they can touch his hair.

In Ames, a larger burg than Indianola where one can get a real cup of Starbucks, the scene is little different.  Streets are crowded with cheap suits and women in curlers and halter tops -- some under scarfs, some not.  Iowa must be the beer drinking capitol of the world -- there are so many beer bars here that you'd think Adolph Coors cut his eye teeth in Iowa. Have you ever seen those inane commercials on MSNBC where the same announcer talks about companies that bend wire or stuff pillows and how wonderful they are?  You know the ones -- you look at them, listen to them and then wonder what the heck they are doing on television.  Well, Iowa is the kind of place where such commercials are produced.

But one thing great about Iowa is that television time is cheap, cheap, cheap.  Even Gary Bauer can afford to spin his Satanic image all night, every night on Iowa cable.

But let me tell you something: Iowans don't have to apologize to New Yorkers in a contest for bullshit.  During election time, Iowa is the Cow-Pattie King.

Take this Straw Poll, for instance.  It's supposed to be a "test" of "organizational ability," but the truth is that few people in Iowa are dumb enough, or dedicated enough, to volunteer to work on a campaign.  No way.  Most of the them are paid and paid handsomely for getting out the "grass-roots" voters.

Bush appraises a prize head of cattle... er, voter in Iowa.

I talked to Kayne Robinson (under cover, of course) who is Iowa Republican leader.  Robinson tried to convince me that that the Straw Poll will show the nation who the top three contenders will be in February of next year.

Robinson, a former Des Moines assistant police chief and an NRA officer, wasn't convincing.  He actually bragged to me that "this year we're actually going to be checking ID to see if the straw poll voters are really from Iowa!"  They hadn't done that in the past, so real politicians like that weasel Senator Phil Gramm bussed in trailer loads of voters to pump up his vote in Ames last time around.  he was not alone -- other candidates did the same.

I asked Robinson what he had been smoking.  He answered, "Marlboros.  Want one?"

"No," I said.  "Do you actually think that the rest of America gives a damn what Iowans think about anything, let alone the future president?"

He just shook his head and walked away muttering to himself.

By the way, here are the standings as of today, according to the Iowa Political Hotline, which surveyed 2,180 people thus far:

BAUER, Gary (626)   ( 28.7%)

BUCHANAN, Patrick (540)   ( 24.8%)

FORBES, Steve (290)   ( 13.3%)

KEYES, Alan (163)   ( 7.5%)

HATCH, Orrin (143)   ( 6.6%)

QUAYLE, Dan (121)   ( 5.6%)

ROCKER, Angel Joy (113)   ( 5.2%)

DOLE, Elizabeth (89)   ( 4.1%)

BUSH, George W. (84)   ( 3.9%)

ALEXANDER, Lamar (5)   ( 0.2%)

McCAIN, John (5)   ( 0.2%)

DIXON, Ken (1)   ( 0.0%)

It doesn't surprise me that Gary Bauer is "leading." Why? Because he directs his people to vote in every web poll right from his web site.

As a matter of fact, the Republican National Committee itself urges its members to cheat on a variety of polls, and to call in to radio stations so as to misinform the nation.

If you want to really gauge the reality of Iowans, check out their views on the so-called Gore/Bradley "race":

BRADLEY, Bill (142)   ( 86.1%)

GORE, Al (23)   ( 13.9%)

Total Votes: 165 Date Started: 3/31/99

I thought I'd have some fun, so I went to the Iowa Straw Poll web site and tried to vote for Joy Rocker 1,000 times.

Liddy Dole tells voters in Des Moines that since hubby Bob started taking those little blue pills, she's learned that size -- of PAC contributions -- does matter!

Anyway, voters from across the state will swarm into Ames and pig out at "Mustard's" barbecue and listen to Clint Black records or dance to Crystal Gayle.  They'll get there for free, too -- all courtesy of a dozen candidates about eleven of which are in it merely to be able to tell their grandchildren they ran for President.  A cardinal example of this is Pat Buchanan, who doesn't have (nor has ever had) a chance in Hell to be elected to anything, let alone President.  Yet he continues to run -- spending other people's hard earned money and using lots of it to treat Iowa farmers to a huge dinner and party so they'll vote for him, no matter what he stands for.

I hear they'll be some celebrities here including Arnold Schwarzenegger -- the future First Steroid-Enhanced Hubby if his wife Maria ever decides to run -- and General Norm Schwarzkopf, who still can't believe he stayed at the Pentagon when he could have been earning the support of millions of the American people instead of fighting a non-war against Saddam.  The biggest laugh of all -- and the one I'm looking forward to seeing most -- is former British Prime Maggie Thatcher, who's jetting in to embarrass her old CIA/Vice-President/President pal George Bush and his boy George W.  She'll be available for photo-ops in Steve Forbes' private tent.

 I'll be lining up for a picture with Miss Iowa at the Bush Tent.  They promised.

The Iowa GOP is shelling out nearly $4 million for this circus.  The Straw Poll, once an insignificant event, is still and insignificant event.  Now, however, the nutball Republicans have made it into a circus -- much as they've transformed the Congress into a shell of bigotry and hatred, and the lynching station for wayward presidents.

Ten thousand hog farmers and farmettes will show for this 'do.  But any candidate who claims this is a make-or-break event must be either out of his mind or smoking reefer.

Any contributors who actually believe in candidates other than George DumbBellYou become instant hypocrites if they cease their steady stream of money to the also-rans on the basis of this ridiculous carnival.  Yet that's what they'll do -- a convenient excuse to cut off the mother's milk of politics to the likes of Bauer, Watts and Rocker.

Bush's people aren't that dumb.  They know if he does win on Saturday he won't be guaranteed a damn thing.   But pols like Lamar Alexander -- and the other dweebs without a shot who simply bleed money from GOP givers that could be going to viable candidates -- are already trying to poison the Straw Poll well by telling reporters that Bush is trying to short-circuit all the caucuses that come next year by "hitting it big" on August 14th.  Lamar and Buchanan think they can anger these Iowa crackers into voting against Bush because he's a spoiled brat and a spoiler.  Good try.  But Iowan Republicans may be as stupid as other American Republicans and think George Jr. has a chance to win against Gore or Bradley.

They haven't read the files I have.

Here is an example of just what the Bush Brat is doing -- he got into a tiff with the other brat, Steve Forbes, to see who would get the big plot of grass outside the coliseum where the Straw Poll will actually occur.  It's the best sport, of course.  The Iowa GOP -- so hot to be fine Americans -- auctioned off the 80,000 square feet of turf to the highest bidder.

George DumbBellYou paid $45,000 for it!

That's $4.50 per vote -- and it doesn't even include the $25 per vote he'll pay for dinner slopped down by each voter.  Why not simply pay the people $30 in cash?

In all, Bush will probably spend at least a million dollars on getting perhaps 5,000 votes -- that includes radio and television, busses, food, booze, pin up girls, bands and the like.  Forbes will spend the same.  Now we're up to $200.00 per vote.  Now that's not such small change.  As a matter of fact - why not just send everyone in America a check for $200 with a note -- "Vote for me, or not. I don't care."

What will happen is this: Bush will most likely win.  Forbes might come in second with Buchanan or Bauer third.

Bauer has corralled Marlys Popma. Marlys is the greatest organizer since St. Peter and worth her weight in platinum.  She is a ideologue -- the Richard Viguerie of Iowa.  "I'm obedient to what it is I believe the Lord told me to do," Popma said. "I'm hoping and I'm praying that the end of the line is a Gary Bauer presidency. But if that is not what God's end line is in calling me to do this, then that will become clear as time goes on."

A perfect Bauer foil, wouldn't you say?

Bush, on the other hand is serviced by preppie Princetonian fool.  He told an Iowa journalist, "Winning is very important," the former collegiate defensive tackle said. "I like to win.... I was a conservative at Princeton in the mid-'70s. I had to defend Nixon during Watergate. I had to be tough or die."

How about: I had to be stupid or die?

What's even weirder about the Straw Poll is that there are no rules.  People can vote two and three times as long as they are sneaky enough -- and there is no penalty if they are caught!

A campaign volunteer ducks and covers as Lamar Alexander presses the flesh. We miss the plaid thing, Lamar!

In 1995, people would vote, wash off a blue stamp on their arm and then vote again -- over and over.  But this year, cheaters beware!  None other than the former deputy chief of police, Kayne Robinson, is in charge of "secret" security measures.

That means he'll let whoever is for his candidate vote more than once.

Lamar Alexander, who knows his chances for campaign cash will be dryer than the Gobi Desert if he doesn't finish second, has visited 60 counties in Iowa trying to impress people that he isn't just a model for medium-priced Brooks Brothers suits.  But, to no avail, I suppose. Iowa voters are stupid, but not stupid enough to vote for a loser.

To top off the laughter, the Republican National Committee is making the Straw Poll a "live event" on the Internet.  I can't wait to watch their servers crash!  RNC Chairman Jim Nicholson -- who happens to be a great guy, by the way -- is not exactly a computer genius. He told the press that the RNC is using a "new" "streaming" technology to provide full-screen television quality broadcast images.  I just about had a hernia laughing -- I wonder if he counted on all those 14.4 and 28.8 modems still in use in Iowa.

The RNC claims that this "new" technology is so new that "currently, no political organization in the world except the RNC has access to such technology."

I'll bet that Osama Bin Laden has it.

“We are going to bring our Republican messengers and the GOP message of lower taxes and less government to every computer in America,” said Nicholson.

Sure, Jim -- but the only people watching will be Republicans!

Nicholson noted that this live webcast of an in-the-field event is part of the RNC’s recently announced e.GOP initiative to "harness" the power of the Internet for communications, fundraising and grassroots organizing.  Go to their web site and see if they've harnessed it or not.

I did.

They didn't.

“Each of our presidential candidates will get a chance to speak directly to voters, uninterrupted and unfiltered by the news media,” observed the national party chairman.  But Nicholson should be wary - without the press prettying up the scene, some of these bozos will look like Hitler to many Americans.

Nicholson noted that, in addition to the live webcast, each candidate's speech to Iowa Republicans would be taped in full and made accessible 24 hours a day through a new RNC online video library (at www.rnc.org). Sure -- that's until they read the polls.  You can bet those speeches will be edited or gone within a few days.

"If you don't vote for me, at least buy my CDs!" Even Orrin Hatch, the well-known recording artist, presidential long shot, and Senator, is in Iowa.

Here's some stuff from Pat Buchanan's web page. He is using the web to cheat the American people.  Read how he gets his supporters to take polls and vote for him in droves.  This is just a small example of how the hard-right wing of the RNC dominates television-related chat rooms as well.

Pat ain't no dummy -- just like his mentor Dick Nixon, he's a trickster.

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Straw Poll Rules

REPUBLICAN PARTY OF IOWA`S OFFICIAL PRESIDENTIAL STRAW POLL
(Rules as of 6/3/99)

I. STRAW POLL MEETINGS:
A. Campaigns are not limited to the number of representatives attending each meeting; however, each campaign must designate one staff member as the primary contact for the event.

SEND 500 people to each meeting and appoint a 95-year-old widow as the official designate.

B. Meetings are scheduled as follows:
- June 1, 1999 -- 3:00 p.m.
- July 6, 1999 -- 3:00 p.m.
- August 3, 1999 -- 3:00 p.m.
All of the above meetings will be held at:
Republican Party of Iowa
521 E. Locust
Des Moines

Send another "schedule" to campaign offices of the other candidates announcing a the meetings are to be held on June 2, July 8th and August 4th at the Armory.

C. Minutes from the June and July meetings will be mailed to all campaigns within a week of the meeting.  The August meeting minutes will be mailed within 2 days following the meeting.

Mail a set of phony minutes where all the other candidates are barred from participating because they weren't at the official meeting.

II. CAMPAIGN MATERIALS:

A. Doors at Hilton will be opened from 8:00 a.m. until 12:00 noon on August 14 for campaigns to decorate, hang banners, etc.  Use the south upper level entrance.

Sneak 600 decorators into the Hilton at 3:00 AM and use every inch of space for yourself.  Then post guards with baseball bats every six feet along the walls.

B. Campaign banners, signs and posters may be hung inside the Coliseum as well as on the concourse level at Hilton.  Signs and posters may be taped to the concrete surfaces of the Coliseum with duct tape only.  The duct tape will be provided by Hilton; tape may be picked up from Sara Miller or Dee Stewart on August 14, between 8:00 a.m. and noon.  No taping is permitted on doors, or glass and wood surfaces.  Banners may be hung with rope.

Send Sara Miller and Dee Stewart round trip tickets on Concorde to Paris with a week's paid stay at the George V.  The plane leaves August 14th at 5 AM.  Send two women to pose as Sara and Dee -- to hand out duct tape that will not stick!

C. Banners may be hung inside the Coliseum, but there is very limited space for large banners.  Banners may be hung on the face of the wall of the balcony level, but cannot extend above or below the concrete surface of the balcony face wall.  Nothing may be placed over any of the air ducts inside the Coliseum.  To meet these constraints, the maximum size for banners placed on the balcony face is 54 inches wide by 42 inches tall.

Make up 100 banners that are 54 inches wide and 42 inches tall - but that must be strung next to each other in order to make sense. Use large letters.

D. No campaign materials may be hung in the area directly behind the stage/podium or on the draping around the stage.  The area is designated for RPI banners only.

Make banners that say RPI on one side and "Me for President" on the other.  As soon as everyone is inside, turn the banners around!

E. NO STICKERS of any type are permitted.  If your candidate`s sticker is found on any surface at Hilton (inside or outside), your campaign will be charged a $5 per sticker clean up fee by the Iowa State Center.

Who cares?  We'll pay the $5.00  Sticker the place from floor to ceiling.  Watch 'em try to collect.

F. Tables will be available for campaigns and organizations to distribute materials on the concourse level.  Any materials given away free of charge are allowed.  Donor card and information will be permitted.  Campaigns and organizations may reserve up to 2 tables at a cost of $250 per table, payable to RPI.  Each campaign must reserve and pay for their desired number of tables by contacting Sara Miller or Dee Stewart by July 30, 1999.  Tables will be numbered and assigned to campaigns and organizations by a draw of a hat at the August 3 meeting.  Iowa State Center will not make changes/additions on event day.

Since Sara and Dee are in Paris, send the fake Sara & Dee and say the charge for a table was $25,000 not $250.00 Have them tear down the tables of candidates who can't pay -- in cash.

G. Campaign materials may not be placed on chairs inside the Coliseum.

Be sure to put stacks of our campaign materials on all chairs inside the Coliseum.  Better yet, put stacks of the opponents' materials on the chairs first.  Then get outraged and make the RPI take them and throw them in the trash -- then put our materials out.

H. Campaigns may not hand out materials inside the Coliseum.

Have 600 people posing as clowns handing out buttons for the opposition  in the Coliseum.

I. Balloon drops, and other special effects, must be approved by RPI and the Iowa State Center, and must be coordinated through Sara Miller or Dee Stewart and the Iowa State Center Event Coordinator by July 30, 1999.  Some special effects may be subject to additional insurance, licensing, or other requirements by the Iowa State Center.  Each campaign must provide their materials -- balloons, bags, or other similar effect set-up.  Hilton will hang bags for each campaign.  The Iowa State Center reserves the right not to hang bags or other special effects if they do not meet Iowa State Center safety standards.  If additional charges are incurred as a result of the special effect, that campaign will be billed by the Iowa State Center.

Get the balloons ready. Sara & Dee will obviously approve!

J. No mylar balloons are allowed.  Helium balloons are allowed but must be tied and weighted.  Please notify Sara Miller or Dee Stewart if your campaign is bringing a helium tank into the Coliseum.  Iowa State Center staff must take care of transporting the tanks once inside Hilton.

Have staff print mylar balloons for all other candidates and inflate them with hair spray.  One careless match...

K. Campaigns are responsible for taking down their own banners and signs and removing any left-over campaign materials at the conclusion of the event.  Any materials remaining will be discarded.

So what?

L. No sticks, sign posts, flag poles, or other similar potentially dangerous items may be brought into the Coliseum.  Banners or flags that restrict other guests’ view of the stage, or otherwise interfere with their participation in the event, are prohibited.  Small, handheld flags on dowels no longer than 18 inches are permitted.

Bring in sawed-off shotguns with flags on the barrels -- but make sure they are not loaded.  Farmers will love it.

III. DOORS/ENTRIES:

A. All Straw Poll attendees enter through the upper level south door or upper level west door.  Only mobility impaired individuals may enter through the lower level west door.

Rent 6,000 wheelchairs and have them ready.

B. Doors open at 3:00 PM.

Send notice to other campaigns that doors open at 6:00 PM.

C. Once attendees enter building, they will not be allowed to re-enter at a later time.  If a guest leaves the building, they will not be allowed to re-enter.

Have our 600 stooges tell everyone not committed to us that their house is on fire or has been burglarized.  Do it quietly.

IV. PARKING:

A. Each campaign will receive 10 VIP parking passes.  You may disburse them however you wish; however, there will not be reserved parking for your candidate, except for these VIP passes.

Make certain that we print up 200 additional VIP passes with the other candidate's names on them.  Distribute them to drunkest teens trying to find a parking space.

B. Parking in fire lanes is prohibited.

Okay -- we can live with that.

C. Iowa State Center personnel will direct buses to special bus parking area.
D. Iowa State Center personnel will direct general parking.
E. Handicap parking is available on the west side of Hilton.

Remember to get wheelchair signs for all of our people to hang on their rear view mirrors.
 

V. TENTS/RECEPTIONS:

A. Spaces on the grounds of the Iowa State Center, used for pre-event receptions, parties, etc., will be auctioned at the July 6 meeting.  Payment for the space must be made in full to RPI by July 9 at 5:00 p.m.  If payment is not made in full by the deadline, the space will be forfeited to RPI and auctioned again.  Campaigns must contact Craig Wiebke at 515/294-3347, to make arrangements for tents, rooms, catering, etc.

Bid highest on everything.  Then make sure that the other campaign finance chairs do not have the money to pay for anything.  Call Craig Wiebke and offer him a trip with Dee and Sara.

B. Arrangements to serve alcohol on the grounds of Iowa State Center must be made through Craig Wiebke at 515/294-3347.  Alcohol must be served through Iowa State Center catering department.  Alcohol may not be brought onto the premises of the Iowa State Center through any other means.

Buy 15,000 pocket flasks disguised as PEZ dispensers.

C. Each campaign is responsible for costs incurred at the Iowa State Center, including expenses for specific requirements of their campaign's activities, as well as their campaigns proportionate portion, according to worth of each pre-event space, of overall event expenses for items shared by all campaigns.  These items include, but are not limited to, traffic directors, paramedics, police, portable toilets, and utility locates.  The Iowa State Center must receive a deposit for the full amount of the campaigns estimated expenses no later than July 30, 1999.  Each campaign is also responsible for arranging for, and payment of, the rental of tents, tables, chairs, and any other equipment required for their activities.

Yeah, sure.

Anyway, you get the picture.  For diehard historians, I'll put the rest of the rules at the bottom of this story -- along with a message from George "DumbBellYou" to his chattel -- er, supporters.

To conclude, let me say this:  IF you think Iowa has the pulse of the nation, then be sure to get on your computers for the live RNC feed of this farce.  If you don't -- take your kid fishing instead.

One more thing to consider:

Al Gore is going to win the presidency anyway.

D. All decorations, banners, signs, etc. must be confined within the borders of the campaigns assigned area.  No signs, banners, or other decorations may be placed within a campaigns area, or on the area's perimeter, in such a way that it faces outward or interferes with another campaigns area.
E. Any banners hung outside on Iowa State Center grounds must have wind-slits to allow air to flow through them.
F. The use of sidewalk chalk, or any other item that may deface Iowa State Center property, either temporarily or permanently, is prohibited.
G. Any streets or sidewalks that go through a campaigns assigned area are considered “public areas”, and may not be obstructed or decorated in any way.

VI. TICKETS:
A. Ticket cost is $25 per person.
B. 4 types of tickets will be used, distinguished by color:
- General admission (balcony) - White
- Reserved seating (on the floor) - Blue
-Complimentary (on the floor) - Green
-Non-voting guest (balcony) - Orange
C. 1,000 reserved floor tickets will be held for campaigns.  Each campaign will be allotted a block of 100 seats.  These sections will be reserved until July 6, 5:00 p.m. If your campaign has not sold their section by July 6, 5:00 p.m., they will be released.  Tickets are considered sold when RPI has received payment in full.  At that time, the campaign completing the sales of their 100 tickets first will have the opportunity to purchase any and all unsold floor tickets.
Floor seating will be reserved according to the order that campaigns complete the sale of their 100 tickets.  The campaign completing the sale of their tickets first gets first choice of reserved section; the second campaign to complete their ticket sales gets the next choice of reserved section, etc.  If more than one campaign simultaneously purchases their full allotment of tickets, a drawing will be held to determine priority seating.  Any additional floor seats remaining after the July 6 meeting will be divided evenly among the aforementioned campaigns.  A subsequent drawing will be held to determine the location of the remaining seats for each campaign.
D. Seating within each reserved section is first come, first served.  Each campaign is responsible for letting their supporters know their assigned section.  It is also the responsibility of each campaign to see to it that their section is filled with their own supporters.
E. Complimentary tickets will be used only for:
- RPI Package Plan members
- Dignitaries as determined by RPI
- State Central Committee members
F. Candidates, spouses and four (4) staff members from each campaign will be admitted free of charge.  These individuals will be admitted through the lower level west doors.  Names of the staff members must be submitted to RPI by the August 3 meeting; special passes will be distributed at that time.
G. Tickets may be purchased through RPI Headquarters from 10:00 a.m. on June 14 until 12:00 noon on August 13, 1999.  Tickets may be purchased at the Hilton Coliseum box office from 8:00 a.m. until 8:00 p.m. on August 14, 1999.
H. Tickets may be purchased with:
- Cash
- Check
- Master Card
- Visa
For reporting purposes, all ticket buyers must provide RPI with their name,
address, occupation, phone number and signature.
I. NO ONE WILL BE ALLOWED TO PARTICIPATE IN THE STRAW POLL WITHOUT PURCHASING A TICKET.  COMPLIMENTARY TICKET HOLDERS LISTED IN E AND F MUST PURCHASE A TICKET IF THEY DESIRE TO VOTE IN THE STRAW POLL.
J. No refunds will be issued.
K. Once tickets are purchased and leave the RPI office, they are no longer RPI`s responsibility.

VII. PROGRAM:
A. Doors for the Iowa Straw Poll open at 3:00 p.m.  Voting will be open from
3:00 p.m. until 8:15 p.m.  Voting participants may vote before, during, or after the candidates’ speeches.  Results will be announced at 9:00 p.m.
B. Each candidate gets 10 minutes to speak, with a 3 minute rally time prior to speaking.  If rally time goes longer than 3 minutes, it will run into candidate speaking time.  Timers will be seated in front of the podium and will signal each candidate with a yellow flag when they have 1 minute remaining, a red flag when no time is left.  Mics will be cut after 10 minutes.
C. There will be no stand-in speakers; only presidential candidates themselves will be allowed a forum.
D. RPI provides standard sound equipment -- no wireless mics.  Teleprompters are not provided by RPI.  If a candidate wants a teleprompter, the campaign must make arrangements and incur the cost.  If teleprompters are used, they must be set up before the program begins and remain set up until the program concludes.
E. Speaking order will be determined at the last Iowa Straw Poll meeting on August 3 by a draw of a hat.  Program outlines will be faxed to each campaign on August 9.
F. Pyro-techniques are allowed at Hilton, if operated by a federally licensed operator.  Campaigns must provide RPI and Iowa State Center a copy of the operator`s license and a description of the planned pyro-technique display.  Campaigns, or the pyrotechnic company, must also provide an additional certificate of insurance per requirements stipulated by the Republican Party and the Iowa State Center.

VIII. BALLOTING:
A. Balloting begins when doors open at 3:00 p.m. and continues until 8:15 p.m. when the voting booths are shut down.  Votes will be tallied by an accounting firm and results will be announced by emcee.
B. Poll will be conducted on a one vote per person basis.
C. Participants of straw poll shall be Iowa residents with appropriate picture identification who will be 18 years of age on or before November 7, 2000.  ID`s will be checked at voting booths.
D. All information obtained from straw poll will be made available to the media and to the campaign committees.
E. Voting machines will be used.  The voting machines will be provided by the Story County Auditor.  Voting machines will be positioned on the concourse level as well as on the floor of the Coliseum.
F. Each campaign is responsible for providing 10 poll watchers.  Two poll watchers from separate campaigns will be stationed at each voting booth.  Campaigns must provide names of poll watchers to RPI by July 30, 1999.
G. Each campaign is responsible for providing 2 representatives to be present for tallying votes.  Campaigns must provide names of representatives by July 30, 1999.
H. Impartial accountants will oversee the voting/tallying process.
I. Candidates will be listed on the voting ballot in alphabetical order according to last name.

IX. MEDIA:
A. The green room will be used as a press filing room.
B. Press members enter the building through east handicap ramp doors.
C. Parking for media is in parking section D-1.
D. The press platform is located directly opposite the stage; mult boxes will be provided.
E. Press may receive credentials on August 14, from 8:00 a.m. until 12:00 noon and from 3:00 p.m. until 5:00 p.m. in the Green Room at Hilton.

X. MISCELLANEOUS:
A. Any arrangements not explicitly addressed in these rules must be cleared by Sara Miller or Dee Stewart by July 30, 1999.  We encourage creativity, however we must operate within the policies of the Iowa State Center, provisions of RPI`s insurance waiver and in regard to general safety concerns.  Special requests made by each campaign will be kept confidential by RPI staff and will not be disclosed to other campaigns.
B. Each candidate will be assigned a holding room.  Rooms will be available when doors open at 3:00 p.m. and may be used until the end of the event.  We will provide table and chairs in each holding room.
       C. Silly string and other similar products are not allowed on the Iowa State Center grounds or inside any of the buildings.
D. Hilton is a non-smoking facility.
E. No food will be served inside Hilton.  Hilton concessions will serve non-alcoholic beverages at their prices.
F. No obstruction of traffic flow on outdoor stairways to either entrances or on the concourse level inside.
G. No animals are allowed on Iowa State Center premises, except those required for assistance to individuals with special needs.
H. RPI will provide music/band inside Hilton.  No other bands are allowed inside the building; bands may play outside.
I. Any materials, banners, etc. left by campaigns will be thrown away.
J. A campaign may not remove another campaign`s materials.
K. RPI will not disclose number of tickets sold or amount of money raised prior to August 14 at the conclusion of the event.
L. Photographers and/or videographers are allowed inside the Coliseum.   However,
they will not be admitted into the building without a ticket.
 

*  RPI RESERVES THE RIGHT TO AMEND THESE RULES AT ANY TIME.  CAMPAIGNS WILL BE NOTIFIED OF ANY CHANGES WHEN THEY ARE FINALIZED.

August 9, 1999
 
 

The Ames Straw Poll is just one week away.  George W. Bush has put together a first rate grass roots team in every county in Iowa. But he needs all of our help NOW to help this team deliver.  We need your help.

While some candidates have spent 6 years preparing for this straw poll, George W. Bush was busy as Texas Governor.  He only started his campaign 60 days ago.

It is crucial that we turn out as many Iowans for Bush as possible.  That's where you come in.  Please contact your family, friends, and business associates who live in Iowa and urge them to attend the straw poll and vote for George W. Bush.

A wonderful day of activities is planned  for Bush supporters, including a great barbecue and live music concerts by Tracy Byrd, Linda Davis, Emilio Navaira, and The Nadas.  Celebrity friends of George W. Bush will be on hand to visit with you, including NFL Hall of Famer Roger Staubach, All-time-leading-scorer Nick Lowery, and World Champion San Antonio Spur Sean Elliott.

Most of all, George and Laura Bush will be there to meet and visit with supporters.

Tickets and transportation are FREE for Bush supporters.

Governor Bush is counting on your help.  Send  any and all contact information you have for Iowa residents to the Bush for President Iowa Office.
iowa@georgewbush.com
Phone: 515-221-2900
Fax: 515-223-8366
 
 

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Paid for by Bush for President, Inc.
www.georgewbush.com