Chris Gelken has nearly 20 years experience as a photographer, writer, news editor and broadcaster.

For the past 11 years Chris has been based in Asia where he now works for Hong Kong's leading AM radio news station, Metro Plus.

Chris also contributes freelance material on a wide variety of topics to newspapers, magazines and radio networks internationally.

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October 14, 1998 -- HONG KONG -- I'm still waiting for the punchline, so I guess it wasn't meant to be funny. Trimble and Hume, winners of the 1998 Nobel Peace Prize - there must be some mistake. Are those guys in Oslo smoking something that would get me arrested here in Hong Kong? Was POTUS being sarcastic when he said that Gerry Adams should've been on the ticket too? I hope so.

Kill someone and you are a murderer; do away with several people and you are a serial killer; Both are likely to result in public revulsion and possibly the death penalty. BUT, associate youself with groups that have participated in the slaughter of thousands of innocent people and you are invited to the White House for dinner. Spend 20 years paying lip service to peace while doing nothing practical to promote an end to senseless murder - and you're on the ballot to get a million bucks!

Seems to me the best way to get a Nobel nomination these days is to spend one's formative years sniping at civilians with an Armalite or AK-47 and planting semtex in pubs and restaurants. What about the folks who have never driven trucks loaded with fertilizer bombs? The American soccer team did more to promote peace when they embraced Iranian players in the World Cup. And that was after they lost.

I am not the greatest fan of Richard Holbrooke, taking another example, but when one compares the number of terrorist associations to which he has been linked with to the number of people who are now still alive because of his efforts - I would have thought he was a more worthy recipient. When I come to think of it, I can't remember any terrorist organisation that has claimed Holbrooke as their political spokesman. Unless you are one of those North Korean or Middle Eastern editorial writers who accuse the U.S. government of being a hot-bed of terrorism.

Dayton is a flawed agreement, the Kosovo deal is a band-aid when surgery is required - but the worst of the killing has stopped. That's got to be worth something.

Those who suggest that this year's award will add impetus to the on-going peace process in Northern Ireland only need to be pointed in the direction of the Wye Plantation in Maryland. If Tim McVeigh becomes a born-again Christian and spends every waking moment spilling his guts on America's far-right militant groups - will he be nominated for the award? I'd like to share more thoughts but I'm off to plan my first political killing - unarmed women and children of course - the first step to cashing in on the Nobel Murder Award. By next year I should be on Interpol's most wanted list - but a few years later you'll shed a sentimental tear when I shake hands with my enemies and agree to sharing the Peace Award payout.

Low-life to laureate, not much of a leap these days is it?

--Chris Gelken