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BUSH TO EXACT REVENGE ON UNIVERSITY
WILL NAME RIGHT-WING EXTREMIST AS LAW SCHOOL DEAN
A Dratt Mudge exclusive! Must credit or I'll throw a hissy fit.

Oct. 25, 1999--WASHINGTON, D.C. (MUDGE REPORT/APJ)--The Mudge Report has learned that Texas Governor and bad-boy presidential wanna-be George W. Bush Jr. plans to exact revenge on the law school that rejected his application for admission in 1973. Bush was instead forced to accept admission to Yale Law school.

According to a report in the Oct. 24th Dallas Morning News, Bush will support the appointment of discredited right-wing extremist Kenneth Winston Starr as dean of the University of Texas Law School--a move which would guarantee the marginalization of the state school as a center for fringe hard-right judicial activists.

A source at Jim-Bob's BBQ in Austin tells The Mudge Report, "What better way to get even with a ninth-string school that 'embarrassed' ol' Shrubya by denying him admission than to appoint a hard-right wingnut and mouthpiece for big tobacco like Starr? That should torpedo the school's reputation forever!"

Bush, whose well-known party-hearty behavior, failed business dealings, brave defense of Texas airspace from the Viet Cong, and consistent use of "colorful metaphors" remains the subject of much discussion in New Haven, Washington, and his carpetbagged "home" state of Texas, was too busy soaking oilmen and defense contractors to be reached for comment.