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More Fun With Carl Greene by Jeff Koopersmith Dear Carl: I got a big kick out of your "exposé." Boy, you're right about the spelling! Can't spell worth a damn and no one here takes "spell-checking" seriously. As a matter of fact, one of your cadre pointed that out -- even on the Lawrence piece -- there were nine words spelled incorrectly there alone. I got one of our techies in for a three-day spelling bee on the entire site. I AM SIMPLY RED FACED! Now to your hit piece on me. Let me go through it line by line, since I admire the trouble you took to try to smear me -- in the great traditional of ultra-right conservatism that smacks of Hitler. (Sorry -- that just slipped out.) So as not to make things TOO confusing for you, my comments are in CAPS. Topic: White Water 12-06-97 JCG I'm new around here so please excuse me if I'm about to stumble over my own keyboard. It may be that Ishould [sic] have gotten a transfer at the last bus stop but since I'm here I'll say my piece. My conservatism has deep roots. I cast my first vote for president in 1964 for Barry Goldwater --- not a popular thing to do in South Texas in those days. But I believe in a type of sane conservatism. My conservatism doesn't BS others into believing things that aren't true and it challenges those who try that tactic. Tonight I was attracted to this headline here on FR: The Latest Larry Lawrence Spin: White House Uses Influential Coopersmith [sic] to Crack the Whip When Reporters Drift From Company Line Jeff Coopersmith's [sic] American Politics 12/05/97 Jeff Coopersmith [sic] Then I read these posts: ------------- To: val porter I don't know the magazine or the writer. Is this tongue in cheek? It must be. From: Nick Combs (ncombs@eatonvance.com) * 12/05/97 11:18:21 PST ------------- To: Nick Combs This is why I am such a valuable pain-in-the-ass to FR. Superior knowledge. I guarantee you this man is real and very influential. What he writes is paid attention to by all the mainstream media because his line goes straight to the top (of the DNC dungheap [sic]: Bill and Hillary) From: val porter (val.porter@usa.net) * 12/05/97 11:24:36 PST ------------- I was surprised that Koopersmith (his correct name) --- an obvious left-of-idiot, was characterized as a bigshot [sic][sic] writer and political insider. (Kind of a Dick Morris without toes in his mouth, I suppose.) So I decided to do a little fact-checking and here's what I found: NOT A "BIG SHOT WRITER." WHY? BECAUSE I DON'T KOWTOW TO POLITICIANS? THEREFORE I CAN'T BE A BELTWAY INSIDER LIKE YOUR HERO GEORGE WILL -- WHO'S KIND OF A HERO OF MINE TOO, BECAUSE MY SON LOVES BASEBALL AND I READ EVERYTHING WILL WRITES ON THE SPORT SO I CAN TALK TO MY BOY ABOUT IT? The first indication Koopersmith was a non-entity [sic] was his writing. Phrases like "CongressNut," and "Everett added -- like the glob of slime he is" seldom get past editors' red pens in real media. And real writers don't use profanity in their columns. (Check the last 500 by George Will for verification of this.) GEE, A "NONENTITY." THAT'S PRETTY HARSH. I RETIRED AT 42 -- ALL ON MY WORK IN WASHINGTON. BUT I SUPPOSE YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE CONGRESSMEN DESERVE RESPECT JUST BECAUSE THEY GET ELECTED. SORRY, PAL. THEY GET ELECTED BY HIRING GUYS LIKE ME TO MANIPULATE YOUR PERCEPTION OF THEM AND REALITY. I THINK GUYS LIKE EVERETT ARE WORSE THAN SLIME. LOOK AT HIM> HE'S USING YOU, HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF DEAD HEROES, AND YOUR OWN INTERNAL AGONIES TO MAKE POLITICAL HAY FOR HIMSELF -- NOT TO MENTION THE DEEP DISTRESS HE'S CAUSING TO AMB. LAWRENCE'S WIDOW. ARE YOU PROUD OF HIM FOR THAT? I BET YOU ARE. ALSO: I AM THE EDITOR OF AMERICAN POLITICS, SO YOUR POINT THERE IS MOOT. I DON'T USE PROFANITY IN MY COLUMNS -- BUT MOST OF THE HUNDRED OR SO PEOPLE FROM THIS GROUP HAVE MASTERED IT JUDGING BY THE E-MAIL WE'VE GOTTEN THE PAST FEW DAYS. Real writers do, however, know how to spell such ordinary terms and words as backpedaled and cemeteries. Koopersmith does not. ABSOLUTELY TRUE -- WE HAVE SOME TERRIBLE PROBLEMS WITH SPELLING ERRORS ON OUR SITE. OF COURSE THAT'S DUE TO THE FACT THAT WE PUBLISH WHAT AMOUNTS TO A FULL BOOK EVERY WEEK PLUS OTHER FEATURES ON VERY TIGHT DEADLINES. BUT YOU ARE SO RIGHT -- I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS. AND BY THE WAY, MANY WRITERS DON'T SPELL WELL. I visited www.koopersmith.com and what an experience that was; everything from a "Paula Jones Centerfold Page" YES, SMART OF YOU TO PICK OUT THE PAULA JONES CENTERFOLD. I HATE THAT FEATURE TOO -- BUT IT BRINGS THE HIGHEST NUMBER OF READERS INTO THE SITE. THAT'S BUSINESS. I THINK ABOUT PULLING IT NEARLY EVERY DAY. BUT MY LOATHING FOR HER AND HER "SUPPORTERS" WINS OUT. to a claim that Koopersmith's readership tops 1.6-million "pages" annually, whatever that means. Two items of note were the "Koopersmith-Abbreviated Biography" and "An Interview ACTUALLY IT'S CLOSER TO 2 MILLION. HERE ARE THE STATS FOR AIT LIFTED OFF NOVEMBER'S REPORTS -- HERE ARE THE FIRST 5.9 DAYS IN DECEMBER. THANKS TO YOU FOLKS WE'RE GROWING AT EVEN A MORE RAPID PACE THAN USUAL:
FOR ALL YOU MATH WIZARDS: ADD UP THE REQUESTS THEN DIVIDE BY 5.9 TO GET THE AVERAGE REQUEST PER DAY. THEN MULTIPLY BY 365.25, THE AVERAGE DAYS IN A YEAR. THE ANSWER IS SOMEWHERE OVER 1.95 MILLION ANNUALLY. WE'RE AS SHOCKED AS YOU ARE, BUT HAPPY BECAUSE OUR PURPOSE IS TO EXPOSE ULTRA-RIGHT GROUPS LIKE YOURS TO PUBLIC SCRUTINY, With Jeff Koopersmith conducted by Steve Wright For KWHH MEDIA . The bio claimed among other things that Koopersmith is a political bigwig who writes frequently for the San Jose Mercury News, Philadelpha [sic] Inquirer and New York Times. Being a fan of both writing and writers I thought wow, this is big-time. The site search at SJ Mercury scanned 3927 files yielding zero hits. Philadelphia likewise yielded zero but the NYT required registration so I bypassed it. THAT'S ABSURD. FIRST OF ALL NO ONE, PARTICULARLY ME, WOULD REFER TO HIMSELF AS A "BIGWIG" -- THOSE ARE YOUR WORDS OR SOMEONE ELSE'S. I DO CONTRIBUTE FREQUENTLY TO THOSE PAPERS. AS A MATTER OF FACT WE CONTRIBUTE TO MORE THAN 400 PAPERS -- AND THEY USE OUR MATERIAL AS REFERENCE. EVERY DAY, A SPECIAL LIST OF JOURNALISTS WHO SIGN TO OUR SERVICE RECEIVE DAILY UPDATES. EVEN THE NEW YORK TIMES HAS USED ONE OF OUR OPINION COLUMNS -- ALMOST VERBATIM -- AS ITS OWN ACCORDING TO OUR PEOPLE IN BOSTON. YOUR SEARCH ON THE SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS IS A LIE. NOT ONLY DO WE CONTRIBUTE TO THEM BUT THEY DID A THREE PAGE BIO/INTERVIEW OF JEFF KOOPERSMITH IN 96 BY LEIGH WEIMERS -- ONE OF THEIR BEST WRITERS -- SO NOW WE KNOW YOU'RE A LIAR. BUT THAT'S OKAY. THERE WAS ALSO A PIECE PRINTED IN THE PHILADELPHIA INQUIRER EARLIER THIS YEAR. I GUESS YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING I thought I'd continue by doing an Internet search on the name "Koopersmith". HotBot yielded 253 hits.I reviewed the first 100 and to my astonishment the disappointing results about this hot line to B&HKlinton [sic] were: 1 hit retrieved one of those "404 Not Found" errors 1 hit was some kind of a forum posting from an AOL user 1 hit was a link on somebody's web page to www.koopersmith.com 97 hits were for www.koopersmith.com ANOTHER LIE. OH, BROTHER. THERE ARE MORE THAN 300 PAGES ON THE AMERICAN POLITICS SITE -- WWW.KOOPERSMITH.COM. SURE, MAYBE ONE OF THEIR LISTINGS IS OLD -- SO WHAT? YOU REALLY ARE A MORON. So much for the real and very influential Jeff Koopersmith. (I also tried a search on Excite but after seeing the "Top 10 matches" were all for www.koopersmith.com I quit.) WHY? On the other hand a HotBot search for "Paul Greenberg" who is editorial page editor for the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette turned up three matches in the first ten hits and none of them were for the AD-G. PAUL GREENBERG? IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ANYWAY? Thedifference? [sic] Many people appreciate the work of the not-well-known Greenberg. Only Koopersmith seems to appreciate Koopersmith's work. MANY IDIOTS APPRECIATE HIS WORK -- THAT'S FOR SURE. But, not to be deterred I decided to take a stab at hunting up KWHH MEDIA, whatever that is. Dunno what I finally found but it wasn't AM or FM radio because none have those call letters, nor was it the EIB or Westwood One networks. I did find a KWHH TV station in what would have to be considered a media hotspot [sic] (move over NY, LA and Chicago) --- it's in Honolulu. Hey, trawler crews and seagulls need to know what's going on, too. GOSH, I GUESS I HAVE TO APOLOGIZE FOR HONOLULU. I SUPPOSE THAT'S JUST NOT WORTH PRINTING. WE THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD INTERVIEW. SORRY -- YOU JERK. By now I figgered I'd been had YES. BY YOUR OWN STUPIDITY AND UNFAMILIARITY WITH INTERNET TECHNOLOGY AND WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE 2 MILLION READERS ON A SITE LIKE THIS. but I wanted to make sure of it. OH YEAH, YOU WANTED TO MAKE SURE!!! HAHAHAHAHHAHA. RIGHT. I pressed on to my final search --- for thestring [sic] "Clinton" in both the bio and voluminous intervew [sic]. I got a paltry three hits. Two were irrelevant. The other indicated that there was, in fact, some linkage between the Perp-In-Chief [sic] and the Puffer-In-Chief [sic]. It appeared that Puffin' Koopersmith may have sent a check or something to the Prez, the DNC or Disney Studios at some time or other. TRUE, BUT NOT TO DISNEY. YOU'RE SO STUPID. WHY DIDN'T YOU DO AN FEC SEARCH? YOU WOULD HAVE FOUND I SUPPORTED MICHAEL COLES AGAINST THE SATANIC NEWT GINGRICH LAST YEAR . AND I'M SENDING HIM THE MAX AGAINST PAUL COVERDELL THIS YEAR FOR HIS US SENATE RACE. I WAS ALSO A MEMBER OF EVERY DEMOCRAT FUNDRAISING ARM IN WASHINGTON AND PROUD OF IT. I'm not sure what the bio stuff indicates beyond puffery and flim-flam [sic] so I invite everyone to read both documents and judge for themselves. You can find 'em at: http://www.koopersmith.com/KoopInterview.html http://www.koopersmith.com/KoopsBiography.htm THANKS FOR THE LINKS! One final note before we leave the pol Koopersmith. His biggest claim --- at least the positioning of it at the top of his bio page would indicate as much --- is a quote about him allegedly from CBS News. It says something about him being the guy who made crime a big election issue --- IN 1981! Dang, Jeff that's good but what have you done lately? I'VE BEEN BATTLING BIGOTS LIKE YOU. Now, you might say, JCG why did you go to all the trouble of messing with this? BECAUSE YOU'RE A LOSER WHO PROBABLY DOESN'T HAVE A JOB AND SITS AROUND ALL DAY TRYING TO MAKE YOURSELF FAMOUS BY TRASHING OTHER PEOPLE -- A TYPICAL PRACTICE BY PEOPLE OF YOUR ILK. That's easy, it's because like I said earlier I believe in a sane, non-BS kind of conservatism. When I see otherwise I figger it's probably just the postings of some fool dingbat --- or some fool liberal plant. "CONSERVATISM?????" ARE YOU REALLY INSANE? WE FIGURATIVELY SPIT ON YOUR BRAND OF CONSERVATISM EVERY DAY. So, bottom line --- is this an attack on val porter? No, because I believe val porter's motives are good. Is this an attack on val porter's "Superior knowledge?" Yup, it is --- because it ain't. WHO THE HECK IS VAL PORTER? Posted by: JCG (jayceegee@bigfoot.com) * 12/06/97 00:01:35 PST To: JCG JCG you are not an idiot, you are a jerk. If you had bothered to ask me, I would have been glad to explain everything as I always do. My whole purpose in putting that up today was to give the clown some exposure that he wouldn't forget. And that's what he got. If you don't think that was the company line he was spouting, what was it? People here are constantly being accused of being right wingnuts and Clinton haters. I thought it would be edifying to show them how really outrageous the leftwing Web is. My "superior knowledge" comment is an inside joke, and the way you took it shows it was wasted on you. And then, there is eschoir. What fun it is to sucker and bait him. But how can I do that when a jackass goes and ruins the victory? I could go on, but why? You just don't get it. What a waste of time! From: val porter (val.porter@usa.net) * 12/06/97 01:09:19 PST DEAR VAL: THANKS. WHAT YOU REALLY ACCOMPLISHED -- YOU GENIUS -- WAS THAT YOU MADE OUR SITE EVEN MORE EXPENSIVE FOR ADVERTISERS, WHICH PUTS MORE MONEY IN OUR POCKETS TO USE AGAINST YOU. YOU'RE BRILLIANT! To: JCG I sent an email to Koopersmith objecting to his calling surviving veterans "shit kickers". While his response did not even mention that, he did manage to describe Lawrence as a terrific fellow, highly respected, who gave a lot of himself to all kinds of people. In fact, he claimed that few people ever gave as much to this country as Lawrence. He said that Lawrence "...deserves a 6x3 piece of dirt at Arlington." In denying he 'spewed venon' on those who died to protect his freedom, he claimed, "Unfortunately they died to protect big business as well, like the guys and gals in Desert Storm." I replied to his reply thusly: Mr. Koopersmith, I have no idea whether Lawrence was a great guy or not. I only know that describing American Veterans as "shit kickers" while you bask in the benefits they've provided is indefensible; every bit as indefensible as spitting on veterans returning from Nam as did some of those persons financed by Mr. Lawrence. I will not contest how much Mr. Lawrence gave for his country because I have no idea. But I suspect that one who holds American Veterans in contempt as your comments would indicate may very well consider financing anti-American protests as great service to the world. I do not. Let me also suggest that those who died in service of our Nation did so for many reasons, but "big business" is not one I suspect was uppermost in most of their minds. Your implication that American Soldiers are sent to their deaths by "big business" is about as accurate as saying that pulling a child from beneath a wrecked vehicle is in service of the pharmaceutical industry. There's a tiny grain of truth in it that entirely misses the point. I also take offense at your referring to an Arlington Cemetery plot as "a piece of dirt". Once again, you belittle those who honorably served our Nation. And once again, you put forward a tiny piece of information(dirt) which while not inaccurate, miserably fails to recognize the whole truth. I don't know what your world view is, or what you may hope to persuade others to believe, but your comments lead me to believe you prefer a very small portion of the truth. Sincerely, Jesse Gilbert From: Jesse Gilbert () * 12/06/97 01:40:16 PST MR. GILBERT IS A LIAR AS WELL. HERE IS A COPY OF MY E-MAIL TO HIM WHERE I "DO" SPEAK TO THE SHIT-KICKER REFERENCE
To: JCG I just gotta add one more thing, because, having just finished reading the end of your very funny hitpiece while in total disbelief at what I was reading, it became clear that you didn't realize that Koopersmith's bio was a "parody." It isn't a real bio. And to complete the housecleaning, yes Koop's name was misspelled, the first typo in the history of FR and I had to make it!! Damn. YES, AND YOU DONT REALIZE THE AMUSEMENT THAT CAUSED? IT WAS A RIOT. YOU SEE, WE HAD TO CALL JEFF COOPERSMITH, WHO WE KNOW WELL, AND HIS MOM AND TELL THEM WHAT HAPPENED. UNLIKE YOU, HE ACTUALLY GOES OUT THERE AND RUNS FOR OFFICE. WE FELT HE COULD GET GRIEF BECAUSE OF YOUR ERROR. ANYWAY, WE SAT AROUND ON THE PHONE LAUGHING AT ALL OF YOU FREEPER FOOLS. IT WAS VERY ENTERTAINING AND GAVE US A CHANCE TO CATCH UP ON THINGS. And of course no one reads Koopersmith. No one reads the [sic] Nation either! Oops there I go again, notbeing [sic] serious enough. OKAY, YOU GOT THAT LAST "OOPS" POINT RIGHT.
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| Copyright © 1997, 1996-2004, American Politics Journal Publications, Inc. |   | |
Jeff Koopersmith