Sunday, August 6, 2000 -- WASHINGTON/NEW YORK (AmpolNS) -- Why is it that every one of the Sunday political blather-fests made such a big point of the "bump" in the polls that li'l Shrubya received following this week's  GOP "Compassion Only When People Are Watching" Convention in Philly?

Was it to tell us that a Bush-Cheney Administration is inevitable?  Or to remind us that they all told us there'd be a bump in Bush's poll numbers -- one of the very few things they have gotten right this year?  Of course, both sides will tell you that a poll bump is inevitable following a convention -- always has been that way, always will be.

But there was a little more critique of the GOP "message" of inclusion on the Sunday shows than even we had anticipated -- not much, but enough to merit mention.

Here's how it came down:

Fox Schmooze Sunday
Tony tames a less rabid Rove

Tony opened FNS by asking if we're seeing a new GOP "or the old one in disguise"  preceding appearances by his first guests, top Bush and Gore advisors.

Neither, Tony -- we're seeing a GOP pushed a hair toward the center, making believe it's a whole lot more moderate than it really is -- that is, until Dick Cheney opened his sneering mouth.

Tony's first guest was Bush campaign top dog Karl Rove, who has gotten a little bit better about keeping his volcanic blustering -- and visibly losing his cool --  in check on the political chat circuit since he started making the rounds a few months back.

Tony began by saying that the GOP convention in Philly had room for everything "except news and controversy." Not true -- hard-righters are whining about the lack of abortion plank and socially reactionary planks in the GOP platform, and the press picked up on it.  The press also picked up on where the hard-line Neofascists were staked out at the convention in Philly -- in a string of rented railroad cars, taking in wheelbarrows of campaign cash not too far out of sight of the press.

Karl Rove predicted (what a stretch) that Bush's numbers would shrink to a single-digit lead by Labor Day.  "We have a fundamental 4-5 point lead we've had for the last few months," said Rove.

Here's a little secret -- unless you count polls provided or leaked to the press, this is not true.  Internal polls from both campaigns have shown the race to be very close, with many giving an edge to Gore -- this despite the hammering Gore takes from the press.

Case in point: "Clinton embarrasses Gore by diminishing him," today's fresh, new GOP spin point.  You have to love it -- the GOP still is running against Clinton!  Well, in truth, to a certain extent, they are -- Clinton's legacy of peace, prosperity and prestige.  Rove also made sure to say that "Clinton has little respect for the office he holds" -- well, gee, Karl, if that's the case, Starr and Hyde had even less respect for the office of the presidency when they tried to force Clinton to resign by smearing the President with a sex scandal using criminal means.

Rove tried in vain to play up "all" the GOP's minority candidates, naming a handful of them while saying that the GOP is "inclusive."

If you're ready to be a sellout, that is.

Rove also slammed Gore for criticizing Cheney for voting against Nelson Mandela's freedom at a fund-raiser for Bill Nelson -- who voted the same way Cheney did.  Got news for you, Rove -- Nelson's contrite about his shortsighted vote; Cheney, meanwhile, keeps lying about the ANC!

Rove tried to claim that Bush loves minorities because college enrollment among minorities is up -- when Brit Hume nailed Rove for the "restoring dignity and honor" line Bush uttered in his acceptance speech as a direct criticism of Clinton.  Rove danced around the issue, then said "the American people" will judge what it means.

We have -- it's called a cheap shot, and it will rebound on the GOP and BushBaby  specifically as the public examines his dignified drinking binges, his honorable soaking of oil investors while lining his own pockets.

Tony asked about that incarcerated kid Bush had mentioned in his acceptance speech -- what happened to him?  Rove wasn't sure.  Brit asked Rove how Bush responded to the kid, who had asked Bush "What do you think of me?"  Again, Rove did not know.

Brit had managed to make Rove undermine, even demolish, the "poignant" moment in Bush's speech.  Rove called it a "powerful moment," but does not know the full story of the exchange, or what happened to the kid.  One can only wonder if the broader context of that moment ends up undermining the story -- or if Bush does not want the public to know what he really would have answered to "What do you think of me?"

Probably, "If there were equal justice in Texas and if there weren't Bush-friendly judges, I might've been behind bars myself, son..."

Tony welcomed Gore advisor Tad Devine, and began by asking if Gore had any major policy differences with Clinton.  We'll find out, said Devine, who got to tear into Bush when Mara Liasson asked him about the "restore dignity and honor." Devine called them "code words" that are a personal attack on Clinton --  "they're trying to say something... they're trying to move this to a place where voters won't allow them.  They think they're running against Clinton.  They're not."

He added, "They don't want to talk about Bush's background."

A hint of things to come after the Dem Convention?  We say yes.

Devine said that attacks in general won't play with the American people.

But they will if they're not presented as a cheap-shot attack and show hypocrisy and contradictory conduct.

Devine also fired away at Bush's economic record and his support of policies that turned a huge surplus into a tiny one.  We loved Devine's fast-paced responses to Brit Hume in particular.  Hume looked taken aback, but gave Devine plenty of space to talk.

Devine, by the way, is a very fast talker -- he gets in easily twice the ideas Rove does in the same amount of time.

Mort Kondracke asked about Bush Daddy's threat to "take on" Clinton, and again Devine said that the GOP is running against Clinton.  Kondracke rather cheaply brought up the impeachment, saying he was the only sitting president to be impeached -- but Devine pointed out that he was impeached against the will of the American people, and that Clinton was essentially exonerated.

Tony asked if Gore still supports the "energy tax" from '93 -- and Devine said that the policies of eight years ago are not the issue.  But Hume came back with a zinger -- then why is the Gore campaign making Cheney's voting record an issue?  Even we'll admit it -- good one, Brit!  Tony asked about the marriage penalty, and Devine pointed out that many married people pay less income tax than if they filed separately before he went into the boilerplate "fiscal discipline" speech.

Mort asked about Gore's veep and brought up another GOP spin line -- the "stature gap" between a potential Dem Veep candidate and Dick Cheney -- but that, we say, depends on what the meaning of stature is.  Stature for voting to keep Mandela behind bars -- stature for demolishing public education -- you get the idea.

Devine spoke so quickly and hit on so many topics it was difficult to follow -- this segment alone covered more territory than Russert does in an entire episode of his sitcom Meet the Press!

After the break, Tony welcomed America's favorite Nazi, Pat Buchanan!  Pat refused to give any details on a possible running mate.  We say he's having trouble -- Jorg Haider can't join him on the ticket because he is an Austrian citizen.

Tony asked Pat if he glommed onto the Reform Party for the $13 million in matching funds (something Ampol has been arguing for the last year) -- and Pat didn't answer; instead he railed against the "Clintonized" GOP's new views on the Department of Education and an openly gay speaker (Jim Kolbe) who voted against "partial birth abortions."  You can tell Kolbe's appearance really stuck in Pat's craw!  He said that if he were elected he would appoint "pro-life Constitutionalists only... if you're not for changing this Supreme Court you're not pro-life," and that the GOP of today "will not go to the wall for a candidate like Robert Bork."

What can we say, Pat, other than you live, you learn -- unless you're a raving fascist!

Why are you talking about abortion so much, asked Tony, when trade was your issue?  Pat slammed PNTR for China when they're "pointing missiles" at the Seventh Fleet.

Uh, yeah, Pat -- above-ground missiles reportedly so unreliable they couldn't deliver a take-out order of egg roll and wonton soup 50 feet without falling apart-- and that take a full day to prep and fuel for launch.

When Tony asked Pat if Ross Perot was behind efforts to stop his campaign, Pat said he did not know how Russ Verney was "able to finance these efforts to derail us [without Perot].... give it up, Mr. Verney... just stop the lawsuit nonsense."  Pat also -- surprise -- said that Jesse Ventura, though he disagrees with him, is "authentic" and "a positive force in American politics."

Tony asked Pat about -- Molly Ivins!  Pat laughed -- but we think even Pat likes Molly's style despite the fact they disagree about everything.  It gave Pat another chance to rail against the GOP's abandonment of "values."

That is, if you consider bigotry, limitation of freedom, isolationism and theocracy "values."

Tony asked Pat about the "debates" debate -- can he get in?  Pat complained about the effort to keep him out.  We agree -- put his extremism on display for our nation to see.  He said it would be more difficult to get his views out without the ability to participate in the debates.  We say it's difficult to educate the public about his dangerous views without others to debate and debunk them -- and expose Pat's hate-driven agenda.

Panel time: Democrats convene in a week, Gore announces his veep in a couple days.  Brit said that "leaked" lists (hey, Brit, did they come from Starr?) show Sen. John Kerrey (D-MA) and Rep. Evan Bayh as faves. Mara gave a boring answer about swing states and Gore and Kerrey being "prep school" grads (like Bush and Cheney weren't?) and Vietnam vets (which Bush and Cheney weren't).  Mort said that the economy and "risky tax schemes" would be an issue and Bob Rubin would span the "stature gap" were he Gore's running mate   Brit talked about Gephardt, and Mort said that Gore must shift to the middle -- but we think he's wrong in that Gore is already there and can still get the unions, women and businesses all to line up behind him.  Mara claimed that Gore "hasn't sewn up the middle."  Tell me, Mara -- has Bush?  Isn't it a little early to be spouting this pap?

Tony recounted Rove's comment that the Bush "lead" would shrink.  Mara said something about "when" Gore doesn't get a big bounce from the Dem convention.

Hint to Brit, Tony and Roger Ailes -- Mara's been a bit more overtly biased than usual of late, and has all the subtlety of a New York City sanitation truck on its rounds.  Dump her -- she sounds shallow and obvious.  Get Karen Tumulty full time -- she's a better interviewer, too!

Mara: "Maybe this year's not about issues, maybe the Democrats won't be able to create" a debate on issues.

Right, Mara -- that is, if you're talking about all the Bush scandals, including whitewashing a sentence against himself and going AWOL from the Air National Guard.

Who is responsible for putting Clinton into the campaign?  Brit blamed Clinton -- but then acknowledged that Clinton has been the dominant political figure of the era.  Mara gave the obvious answer of whether Clinton helps or hurts Gore -- Bill helps him among die-hard Dems.  But we think she's wrong about Clinton "hurting" Gore with other voters, because she does not factor in how Bush's own past will hurt Bush.

The McLaugh-In Group
Not live from Philly

Ranting pundit John McLaughlin was not-so-live from Philly this week for the opening of his show.  Issue one: Bush came, Bush saw, did he conquer?  Video clips from Bush's acceptance speech followed; John avoided the portions that sounded like they were lifted from Bill Clinton.

Mike Barone said "it was presidential" and "set out basic issues" with "plausible arguments that the Clinton Administration has not delivered."  Barone also said that he set out "character and authenticity" as an issue, saying Gore was not authentic.

What a laugh -- Bush was about as authentic as a three-dollar bill in his speech!  He looked stiff, coached, uncomfortable.

Eleanor said that what Barone called substance was actually cotton candy and that Bush is expecting America to have collective amnesia about the GOP.  Tony Blankley called it a "stunning" speech and that conventioneers "came because they believed in him."  Huh?  They came because they were elected by their parties.  Larry O'Donnell scoffed at Tony's "stunning" comment, and said that Bush will not be able to reform Social Security without hitting older citizens.  Barone called Social Security privatization (without using the word) "an idea whose time has come."

And gone, Barone!

Eleanor pointed out that Barone was on message by not using the word "privatization."  John asked the old question -- who is Bush running against -- everyone said Bill, and Barone correctly pointed out the "no third term" theme of the Bush campaign.  Eleanor said that the character issue has not worked for the GOP.

Issue one and a half: Vice President Dick Cheney.  Video clips of Cheney's sneering speech followed.  John  said the delegates loved the speech, and Tony said that it opens up the Dems to claim the GOP is in attack mode.  Larry pointed out that an NBC focus group went negative on Cheney when Cheney went negative -- and Eleanor pointed out that the group was run by right-winger Frank Luntz.  Barone said Cheney's point was that a Gore Administration would be no different that a Clinton Administration -- and that Clinton was not looked upon favorably!

Hahahaha -- Clinton's favorables far outweigh his unfavorables -- and he's way more popular than Reagan was at the end of his disastrous tenure.  And Eleanor pointed this out.  Barone admitted this was true about job approval, but then claimed it was not true about his character.  Again, Barone is wrong based on current favorability numbers.

The panel engaged in the expected "how good was the acceptance speech" -- and gave predictable answers.

Issue two: diversity and inclusiveness!  Rate the strategy!  Eleanor said that the GOP overdid it and looked artificial -- but they do have to start somewhere.  If Bush can change the party, fine, but where's the substantial change?

The big surprise -- John called the comparison by The New York Times of night one of the GOP Convention to a "minstrel show" a form of "neo-racism."  What nonsense -- what it shows is that most Americans can handle these comparisons and phrases based on more critical and less emotional criteria than they could a generation ago.

If anything, John was engaged in "neo-political-correctness." And Tony blew off the comment (knowing this to be the case).  So what is the big story?  Larry said that the GOP got the "show business" of the convention right, getting rid of the Buchanan types.  John started talking about the platform hearings -- and the toned-down platform.  Barone said Bush is "open" to Latino voters.

Right, Mikey -- "open" to hoodwinking them using his cute Hispanic nephew!

There was a lot of pap about "unity" -- but Tony was right when he characterized it as a "strategic" move.  Eleanor said that Bush's inclusiveness was questionable.  Larry said that Powell stole the show.

Issue three: Clinton's "cheap shot" -- John tried to turn Clinton's hilarious off-the-cuff remarks about Bush Jr., and Bush Sr.'s testy "threat" to tell America what he thinks of Clinton.  Like we don't already know!  Eleanor said Clinton did draw Bush Daddy into the fray -- and loved Bush Daddy's "as a human being and a person" fractured English -- "what's the difference?".  Larry called it the stupidest thing Clinton did all year.

Stupid?  It showed how thin-skinned the Bushes are. And if Bush Daddy carries through on his threat, Bush loses in the area of character. Clinton has nothing to lose -- nor does Gore -- by making the Bush family look like they're engaged in a pissing contest!

Really dumb predictions!
Barone forecast a "big bounce" in poll numbers for Republican House incumbents.
Eleanor Clift predicts "more negative information coming out on the Texas budget shortfall. "
Blankley said Bush will "get an unprecedented 98% of the Republican vote in November."  Not with Buchanan in the race and dirt on Bush about to explode, Tony!
O'Donnell said that Los Angeles police "will not do the perfect job handling the protesters that the Philadelphia police did" -- but nothing about the extreme bails imposed on protesters.
John McLaughlin gave a sunny prediction "that George W. Bush's winning margin of 7-plus points in November will seal victory for embattled Republican Senators Spencer Abraham of Michigan and John Ashcroft of Missouri."

We laughed out loud at that one -- Abraham's toast, and probably Ashcroft, too. 

Face the Nation

Bob Schieffer welcomed Bob Shrum, Gore advisor, who has been making some impressive appearances on the Sunday shows in recent weeks -- and he refused to speculate on the Gore Veepstakes.  Schieffer asked Shrum about Bush's comments on the "wasted opportunities" he claims Clinton didn't act on -- and Shrum slammed the huge GOP deficits "despite hard-working Americans" in the early 90s.  Shrum then mentioned minimum wage, family leave and health care for kids -- there's been great progress in these under Clinton-Gore despite GOP roadblocks.  Gloria Borger asked about GOP claims that talk about "honor and dignity" not being digs at Clinton -- Shrum called them "code words that were not well-coded."  He then slammed Bush's plan on prescription drug coverage.  Schieffer asked Shrum about Gore's critique of the Bradley health plan a "risky scheme" -- but Shrum said Gore and Bradley were close on health care, but Bush's plan would cause a deficit.

Bob welcomed Karen Hughes, and a great exchange ensued -- Hughes said "so many misrepresentations, so little time."  Shrum needled her, daring her to answer his charges with specifics.

Hughes didn't -- she just parroted Bush's words on "honor and dignity" in non-answer to the first question.  Bob mentioned Democrat criticism of the GOP convention as a "masquerade ball", and Hughes called this cutting critique "political rhetoric."  Borger asked about differences between Clinton and Gore and Hughes cheap-shotted indirectly, calling Gore a strong "family man."

That means Clinton isn't, Karen?  That he doesn't love his daughter and wife?  How the hell would YOU know?

Hughes claimed that they had put Gore "in a box" with their "outstanding" choice of Cheney -- but failed to support her assertion with strong arguments.  Borger pointed out that the Dems have one -- and may have two -- real war vets, and Hughes claimed that Americans want to "rebuild" the military.

Rebuild?  There's NO NEED, Karen  -- unless Bush-Cheney plans to induce a new Cold War.

Bob asked Shrum about Hughes's comment that potential Veeps have "no stature," and Shrum slammed the attack as groundless -- then slammed Bush for not getting behind a fair marriage penalty repeal, as Gore supports.  Hughes claimed that Bush supports across-the-board tax cuts with the poor getting the largest percentage -- but how can this be true when few poor people pay any taxes except state sales taxes?  As usual, Hughes is lying through her teeth -- and a number of analysts say the impact of the Bush schemes have little impact on the middle class but give the well-off big breaks.

Next up -- Pat Buchanan, who essentially recapped his critique of the GOP convention from Fox News Sunday.  Pat said he'd been "quarantined with the rest of the conservatives... interned" like the Japanese during WWII!  He reiterated his view that the GOP is moving toward the "gay rights agenda."

Right, Pat -- an agenda that includes not being beaten to death for the way you're born.  "Agenda" -- or basic constitutional rights?

Pat promised a high-energy campaign against Gore.  Borger asked about the $12.5 million dollar "pot" that Pat would get, and Pat said that as a nationally recognized party, the Reformers are entitled to it.  He called Dems and the GOP "the two Clinton parties."

He admitted he has to get into the double digits for any hope at debates, then reiterated his accusation of a "media blackout" of his campaign.  Hahahahaha -- Pat got a free ride from The McLaugh-In Group and CNN for years -- and now whines about no coverage!  Please, Pat, stop -- you're killing us!

Borger pointed out that Cheney is arguably more conservative than Bush, notably on anti-choice issues.  Pat slammed Bush for not being pro-life, having named judges to Texas courts that threw out anti-abortion laws.  Pat also made fun of the GOP "inclusiveness," reiterating the Comedy Central line about the convention was true -- "all the black folks were on the court and all the white guys were in the audience."

If this is how Pat wants to look critical of the GOP and "inclusive" himself, it's not working.  In fact, Pat's appearance was a big disappointment -- he was less combative than usual (outside of his anti-abortion ranting) and covered no ground that hadn't already been on FNS.  Maybe he realizes it is all over -- and is just coasting to get his hands on those matching funds!

Bob Schieffer's final word was on the "obscene levels" of fundraising surrounding the conventions, emphasizing that even GOP Sen. Chuck Hagel spoke out against the atmosphere of greed.  He also showcased  video of a pay-to-fish outing with Dennis Hastert -- asking who'd really want to go fishing with the guy, and playing comments by one angler explaining that this is "the way things get done."

Eat the (Vice-)Prezz
Formerly "Meet the Press" -- Fat Tim continues his "stop Gore" campaign

We wondered how Tim would celebrate the coronation of George DumbBellYou Bush today.

Russert's first guest was John McCain, formerly known as "JJ" McCain. We wonder why this moniker has disappeared.

McCain said that he has never seen the GOP as unified since they renominated Ronald Reagan in 1984 -- when Reagan didn't even remember his own name.

Ralph Nader crashed the GOP convention, and Russert showed a clip of him putting down McCain for endorsing Bush when Bush is entirely funded by corporate America.

Of course, Nader should have mentioned that the DNC and Gore are also supported entirely by corporate America -- including pharmaceutical companies (but only to disguise their mega-support of Bush and the GOP).

McCain claimed that the Bush campaign did not ask him to amend his speech

But that is not true. Several times the Bush people -- and especially Adolf Eichmann look-alike and act-alike Karl "Der Unterfuhrer" Rove -- did just that. McCain is still holding onto his fantasy that in a country exclusively run by business -- with its ear to the ground and taking the national temperature using so-called special interest group thermometers -- he, Senator McCain, will single-handedly be able to stop them from giving money to the pols.

Sure -- and Minnie Mouse is a lesbian, JJ!

Russert then played the clip of the Shrub saying that two divisions of the army would not be ready to answer Shrub's call to war. The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Shelton, went bananas over W.'s stupid comment -- and, even if true, it was the most irresponsible comment one could make on international television.

Perhaps Saddam was watching this idiot, and laughing almost as hard at he does at Dubya's Poppy.

McCain said he is angry that the Congress spent $4 million (or did he say $4 billion?) to save the desert tortoise rather than beef up the already greatest killing machine in world history. McCain was showing his real skin: that of a guy who was locked up during almost the entirety of the Vietnam war, a man who fantasizes about increasing WAR spending -- not DEFENSE spending, as Russert calls it. Why not call a spade a spade (that's a bridge term, not racist term, E.A.)!

McCain said he thinks he can more effective as a United States Senator than as the Secretary of War.

Russert then said NBC has "obtained" a letter from Pat Robertson in which he apologized to McCain for calling him names and calling Warren Rudman a bigot -- which he is, by the way, making this the only time we have agreed with Robertson in two decades. McCain said he accepts Robertson's apology but will not apologize to him.

He kissed Bush's ass during the entire interview. Talk about a sellout -- McCain is finished as a national figure.

Russert asked McCain whom he thinks should be Gore's VP candidate. We think it will be John Kerrey -- the Abe-Lincoln-HUGE-chinned Senator who was also a war hero.

Russert slipped in a dirty comment: how bout John Kerrey, who served in Vietnam and Al Gore who "also had some time in Vietnam?" What a jerk. Russert, to our knowledge, never served either. He was too busy gaining weight.

Russert then embarrassed McCain by showing him crying on another clip where he was saying goodbye to the people who helped him with his campaign.

"I fully expect to be campaigning for George W. Bush in 2004," said McCain. He is right -- but not for Bush's re-election, but for his comeback, which will never happen.

Aren't you sick of seeing Russert's pals on this show? How many times has he had McCain and the moronic Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura on his program this year alone? Jesse Ventura is a has-been who will never be re-elected as Minnesota's Governor-in-dementia.

Russert then welcomed Senate Minority Leader Tom Daschle -- such a nice guy that he loves everyone, including the grossly overweight Tim.

Russert brought him on merely to show his some fraudulent NBC "poll" which "shows" Gore "losing" to Bush in a meaningless horse race by 11 points. He also "showed" that Republicans are 92% behind Bush and Democrats are only 70% behind Gore.

Here's the truth: first of all, Republicans are like lemmings -- they always unite behind their candidates before they jump off the cliff (except Bob Dole of course) because they have no minds of the their own. Remember, GOP IQs as tested at The University of Chicago Medical School averaged a full 38 points lower than Democrat's.

Democrats think. That's why they haven't jumped on the Gore bandwagon. They didn't jump on Clinton either, and never have done so, with the exception of JFK. Even FDR had internal challenges.

Russert then highlighted Gore as a "killer" and then lied, asserting that Gore plans to win by merely ripping Bush's lungs out. Gore is not like this. He says the tough stuff at DNC pep rallies -- but Bush has said worse, far worse. He has accused Democrats of being Socialists, but only to throw rhetorical "red meat" to the morons who follow him.

Russert then turned on Daschle and called him a "liar" by showing a quote the week before which seems -- and we stress "seems" -- to correct Daschle's statements this morning about NE Senate choices for VP by Gore.

But who should be surprised? Russert is a GOP operative and doing the work of rabidly anti-Democrat GE boss Jack Welch..

Russert then picked on Senator John Edwards -- on the list, but certainly not Gore's choice. Russert panned Edwards, basically commenting that Edwards could not be qualified because he only served 17 months in the Senate -- and because he was once "a trial lawyer."

Russert should worry about "trial lawyers" in general.

Daschle said he thinks that this race will be a toss-up by Labor Day. Russert sneered at this thought even as he offers it in a negative way.

Russert's next guest: Ralph "Multi-millionaire Friend of the People" Nader -- in a cheap and easy move, of course, to hurt the Vice President.

Nader is running merely to collect more money for his over-bloated bank accounts -- money made from hoodwinking well-intentioned people all of the time. Nader in fact pooh-poohs environmental concerns that HE doesn't think of first, including the devastating impact of indoor radiation, especially on children and women. This run, a race he could not possibly win, is the greatest example of this opportunistic "public advocate's" gargantuan ego -- an ego that needs busting down.

Watch for us to tell the truth about Nader: his love affairs, his own sexual preferences, and the way he and his super-masculine girlfriend run his BUSINESS -- not a non-profit organization at all.

Nader, a Brutus to the Democratic and Green parties -- both filled with people who made him rich -- is attempting to destroy the candidacy of Al Gore merely to be able to raise his speaking fees and book sales. Gore, who talks and writes more about the environment then any federal official, and has done so for nearly three decades, should spit on Nader.

Russert showed another set of pointless poll figures to hurt Gore. This poll shows Nader with 15% of the vote. Nader claimed that this 15%, which is so soft as to be laughable, are votes he EARNED. Tim then quoted Barney Frank, who said that the Nader argument is that there is no difference between Bush and Gore. Frank said he thinks that Nader is a liar who has never spoken out for the poor, welfare recipients, or anyone else except himself.

And Frank is right -- Nader is really a lot like Pat Pukeanan. Listen to him talk about NAFTA. He thinks as if it were still the 60s. He attacks all branches and departments of government. He says that they never change. He claims that he is way ahead of Al Gore on gays. We bet.

Nader did say this: "Gay people want to engage in marriage and adopt kids -- if they were not gay, people would say good." But then he claimed that George Bush is not really against partial birth abortion. Huh? What an imbecile!

Nader said he doesn't care what he does to destroy Gore. He is out to expand "a significant third party" so that never again can the DNC and GOP tell the American people they have nowhere to go. Nader, who thinks he is powerful (like Buchanan), said he is sending a wakeup call to the DNC.

Nader then said, prompted by Tim's inability not to bring up the failed impeachment at least once on each MTP episode, that he wanted Clinton impeached because he "took a year of journalism from the American people," that there is "a good chance" Clinton will be disbarred, and that he "LIED ABOUT IT" (the Lewinsky flap).

A year of "journalism?" The entire Ampol staff was laughing and catcalling at heavy-metal volume -- Liz shouted, "You mean Matt Drudge or Fat Tim journalism, Ralphie?"

By the way -- we will be reporting Nader's lies -- in detail -- as the months go on.

Nader said that "Star Wars" missile defense won't work and quotes the American Physics Society -- whom he probably paid for its report -- who claimed that this missile defense system won't work.

Nader put down Bush, saying that Gore talks a lot better -- about solar energy. Hahahaha -- solar energy! Nader also wants industrial hemp (i.e. marijuana) to replace coal. What else does this insane bozo want?

What he wants is the Socialism of the United States. Everything he said smacks of Lenin -- yet he hides behind the skirts of the "evil boards of directors" so he can get away with living in Colebrook Connecticut, an idyllic hideaway for WASPS (Nader doesn't practice any religion we are aware of but greed for power). He is anathema and a tired out old loser who started off trying to do one good thing (the Corvair exposé) and then convinced himself -- because he went to an Ivy League school and made a lot of money with his book Unsafe at Any Speed -- that he was America's Messiah of Politics.

Well, he isn't. He is just the worst kind of poseur imaginable, one who cares nothing about America, the world, Americans or any other people's of the world.

Instead of running for President, why isn't he using his resources -- including loyal supporters -- to pressure pharmaceutical companies to give AIDS drugs to Africa free of charge. Africans are dying, quickly, from the disease. Nader's perfect for this job.

Next, Ventura came on. Who gives a damn? Tim played a clip of "The Rock" -- a moronic professional wrestler who thinks he controls 14 million voters in America who he can dictate to. Ventura thinks wrestling fans can control the outcome of a presidential campaign! Hahahaha. God, what next?

He played a clip of the Minnesota GOP delegation, the head of which called Ventura "A Goofy Governor" -- even as he praised the other moron, "The Rock." 

Gee, this is really important, Fat Tim! Do you have some sexual fascination for Jesse? A psychiatrist might think so.

Ventura refused to take the bait when Russert attempted to get him to say that wrestling fans would vote for Bush. Hahahahaha -- of course they would, they are morons! Ventura told Russert that ratings on the GOP convention were the lowest in history, and he is right.

But we think the DNC convention ratings will be even lower.  Why? Because pigs like Russert have succeeded in convincing American voters that the entire government, from the President down, are liars, manipulators and criminals. Russert, the ringleader of this group of ignorant and mostly self-appointed pundits, should live in disgrace for the rest of his life and be shunned by the rest of American society -- especially the "society" inside the Beltway.

Eat the Press was winding sown -- Venture closed by saying he would like to have a beer with both Bush and Gore so he could "knock both their heads together."

ASIDE: this morning the news is reporting that in Governor Jeb Bush's state, Florida, beaches in posh Jupiter are closed AGAIN due to high levels of bacteria which can enter the body though the pores of the skin.

This Weak
Scam and Cocky "bump" their own credibility down even further!

Naturally, Scam and Cocky began the show this week saying that Bush was "energized" and got a "bump" out the convention. But the truth is that Bush got no real bump from the convention -- which was watched by fewer than 1% of the American population, with more than half of those 1% (that's 0.50% for our GOP readers who can't do math) apt not to vote at all. In fact, national polls -- which are historically INACCURATE, sometimes by as much a 12% -- show absolutely no bump for Bush, which could mean he went into the negative through his convention shenanigans.

Linda Douglass, that girl from Beverly Hillbillies (or was that Donna Douglas? they look so alike you can't tell), reported that Gore was a "combatant" in the Vietnam War -- we're not sure about that -- then she said that Lieberman has some "downsides... he is Jewish." Hahahaha -- that's the last time we see Linda Douglas on television. We hope.

Cocky interviewed Gore Campaign Director and ex-Secretary of Commerce Bill Daley. Cocky asked the same stupid question about John Edwards being in the Senate for "only" 17 months. God, what do these morons do, read each other's questions before they tape these shows? Daley won't answer her except to say that Gore is taking this very seriously.

We hope so.

Cocky quoted some nobody saying that Joe Lieberman would be a slam-dunk if he wasn't an Orthodox Jew. Cocky, you idiot (she of course is a Bible-weeping Catholic whose mummie is the Ambassadorette to the Vatican) -- are you a little Jew hater? Nope -- maybe Steve Roberts, her ne'er-do-well husband, is Jewish. Or is it just that she feels it important to mark SOME Jews ?

They talk about all the possible choices. We think, of course, that he should choose Bill Clinton, who should then resign the presidency in favor of Gore so he can run for Vice President (is that constitutional? our question of the week) and Gore can run from the Oval Office!

Cocky wants to know if the "Dark Horse" is a filly. Oh, hahahaha, maybe it's her Louisiana pol mother.

She then goes to the ridiculous ABC focus group, where most of the panelists have big problems - and need to get on E! Entertainment's Fashion Emergency as quickly as possible. Perhaps Cocky should join them. Today she is wearing some '50s puke-blue stretch suit.

Daley obviously thinks Cocky is in idiot. But he treated her as well as he can stomach -- because he is afraid of her and her power to make anti-Jew slurs on national television and still keep her job.

Daley called the RNC Convention "a good show" -- but goes no further in attacking those weasels for posing as liberal Democrats who are on their knees to God all the time and think that people will adopt babies born with three heads.

Seems like Cocky and Scam are still trying to bash Gore. We hope we hear some Bush bashing from them today as well.

J.C. Watts, Jennifer Dunn (a fox) and Jim Kolbe -- all Republicans -- join Scam to talk about the GOP Convention.

Scam quoted Pat Robertson, who said that the GOP Convention was "Republicans being Democrats." J.C. said they just changed "their methods." Jennifer agreed with J.C. and said people were finally getting it.

Getting what?  That the GOP was lying all week?

Jim Kolbe, who looked like he was about to keel over from old age, thought the convention showed a new face (mask) and now "we have to act on it." One of our senior people worked for the RNC outreach program in D.C.. They have been trying to get minorities for 20 years -- and have failed because they are all Aryan Nation members at heart.

Dunn said that the biggest missing link is "honesty and integrity" in the White House. Hahahaha -- yeah, the Shrub will really bring that!

J.C. Watts agreed that the GOP should not pick on Clinton, right after Dunn the Duncette insulted Clinton with her remark. J.C. is in Palm Beach, or rather West Palm Beach. If he were in Palm Beach, the police would stop him and ask him to see his car registration to make sure the car was not stolen.

Scam said what were all these blacks doing on the platform with Bush? J.C. said they were "highlighting" the blacks. Hahahaha -- yes, all 12 of them who are Republican elected officials, out of 5 THOUSAND of them.

J.C. claimed that "all" the people who are Republicans who are black, red and brown rarely are featured. Scam, hilariously, points out that the GOP platform wants to eliminate preferential treatment for minorities -- Jim Kolbe calls black American leaders "Those people" and said that Condy Rice and "Colon Bowel" are PROVEN leaders.

Yes, but leaders of what? Certainly not the black community!  We were lauging out loud!

Then Scam asked old man Kolbe about gay Americans. He insulted the pig Lynne Cheney (good for you, Sam -- about time) who lied on national television last week about her daughter coming out of the closet as a lesbian. Lynne Cheney is a known liar like her do-nothing husband. Kolbe said that this is not an issue.

But it obviously is because Lynne Cheney, like Hillary Clinton, is a career public trough slurper and could end up the First Lady who runs Dick Cheney by pulling on his short hairs. Lynne Cheney, who lies to America on national television, was then forced to sit next to her wonderful daughter Mary to prove she still loved her "despite" her sexual preference.

Of course, most of the idiots watching the convention didn't even know who she was and who Mary was. 

We'll tell you -- Mary is the only decent person in the satanic Cheney family.

We asked Mary Cheney what she thought of her mother's outright lie on national television. She answered " Well, look at the source."

Of course Mary will deny this. But take it from us, that is what she answered -- and she didn't mean Cocky, although we would include her in the insult.

Really.

What does Mary's lesbian lifestyle have to do with anything? Nothing, Cocky.  And it's none of your business.

For great entertainment, the super-idiot Pat Buchanan was the next guest. We were roaring again with laughter -- George Will interviewed his fellow Nazi.

Will played the infamous "Pukeanan" speech at the '92 GOP convention where Pat claimed that America in in a cultural (meaning religious) war. He then attacked old man Kolbe as the aging queen he openly is. Hahahaha -- only Pukeanan would do that. He then attacked Bush because "he is really pro-choice."

Pukeanan did not answer Will's question about whether he would allow Kolbe on the stage. Pukeanan attacks Karl "Unterfuhrer" Rove for saying that the (raciest and hypocritical) GOP reputation is over. Sure, and Pat Buchanan didn't ban his sister Bay from the family because she happened to love and marry a Mormon.

Will was attempting to be a liberal, but it isn't working. We are waiting for him to ask about Senator "Jew" Lieberman so both of them could top Cocky's little racist anti-Semitic outburst.

Will wanted to know whether Pukeanan will really get the nomination of the Reform Party. Hahahaha -- Pukeanan cannot even find a SINGLE person that will run with him. The man is a disease.

Pukeanan said he needs to overcome a "media blackout!" Oh, puh-leeease! Anytime television concentrates on actual politics and issues it is a blackout -- but we invite you to see gavel-to-gavel coverage of Buchanan being lynched by every good American in this country.

George Staphylococcus was spying on a focus group from another room in Chicago. This focus group was made up of morons from the corn belt. The leader "convinced" them that the GOP was embracing all races and creeds. Hahahahaha. One man said something that was true, however" even if this is a masquerade, it is at least a start.

However the group was smart enough to jump on "doesn't know Dick" Cheney for calling Clinton and Gore one and the same.

The panel also like that Laura "The Librarian" Bush is not like Hillary Clinton -- in other words, she is stupid.

George Bush Sr. said that if Clinton continued to attack "My son" he was going to "comment" on Bill Clinton as a person.

What he meant -- and what everyone understood -- was that he would use his CIA and FBI connections to try an get more dirt on Clinton as he did when he lost to Clinton so badly in 1992. It was Bush, after all, that started the witch hunt on the Clintons. What a piece of garbage this man is -- just like his Nazi-loving father Prescott. who supported Hitler financially before we entered World War II. Prescott of course was hoping that Hitler would kill all the Jews who were, at the time, taking over the banking industry in the USA because of idiots likes Averill Harriman (whom FDR and Truman wrote was the dumbest and most arrogant nothing that each had every met). Bush, a big timer at Brown Brothers  Harriman, was nervous about "these Jews" -- and that is why we he loaned Hitler (non-recourse loans of course) tens of millions in the late 1930's as little George sat on his knee learning how to be a WASP, a STINGING wasp.

The Jewish community has not forgotten the Bush family. Believe us.

We noticed that Scam, now for three weeks, has been opening the panel discussion by telling viewers that everything they will hear, from now on out, is the panelists opinion. He basically said, "Hey, if you don't agree, screw you!" This is the first time in history that such a thing has happened -- and the danger of course is that one should believe what they heard over the previous 45 minutes was FACT!

Scam -- you are really a piece of work.

Scam pointed out that not only didn't the Shrub SMIRK during his acceptance speech (but he did) -- but he never even smiled during the Convention (also not true - neither during his speech, or during the convention).

In fact, he smirked and smirk-smiled all during the four days. Do you remember when he addressed the convention from some high school classroom where every kid in the room obviously hated his guts? He was certainly all smirks and smiles there.

Staph continued to say that John Edwards may be Gore's pick. We hope so, because Edwards can wipe the floor with Cheney, and Bush and Gore can just be the nice guys.

Cocky, who likes Edwards, said that some VP candidates surprise us during the campaign. Yeah, like Quayle -- or is it Quail?

Scam wanted to know what Al Gore has to do at the convention.

The answer is nothing. Nobody will be watching anyway -- and the media will continue to bash him no matter what he does.

Cocky thinks this is a terrible problem because she believes the focus group.

Will made fun of Gore's sister's death. "He has been nothing but open about his life."

Will claimed that there was nothing that the RNC could do not to be ATTACKED by the media. Is this guy insane? Not one media outlet criticized the Bush coronation -- including CNN, the unofficial network of the Liberals.

Will is either a liar or lives in a bell jar.

That was it for Scam and Cocky.

CNN Late Edition

WE caught the first segment of Late Edition -- Wolf Blitzer's first guest was Gore Campaign boss Bill Daley.  Wolf first asked about the Veep choice and the two covered the expected territory -- But Daley lit into Bush campaign boss Karl Rove for his derisive comments on Sen. John Edwards during the week. Much of the talk centered on Massachusetts Senator John Kerrey.  Talk turned to Sen. Joe Lieberman (D-CT), and Wolf had to ask it -- is America ready for a Jewish vice-president?  At first it sounded like a loaded question -- but Wolf got Daley to comment on the reality of anti-Semitism in some quarters of the nation -- a not-so-veiled swipe at certain elements within the GOP and Buchanan brigade.

Wolf could not resist putting up meaningless poll numbers -- especially a four-way presidential race -- showing Bush in the lead.  Daley talked about conventions generating "excitement" but being generally "shallow."

A little later, Wolf picked up on a comment made earlier this week in American Politics Journal, playing back-to-back comments by Cheney this week and Gore in 1992 saying "it is time for them to go."

Wolf: "Plagiarism?"  Daley essentially said yes.

Well, Wolf, isn't it about time you confront Cheney -- the way the press confronted Biden some years back concerning his "borrowing" a British stump speech?  It's been more than three days, and we do not know of one journalist who has asked Cheney about his theft of Gore's mantra.

Maybe it's time for them -- meaning the "pack journalists" -- to go!