Sunday, Feb. 25, 2001 -- NEW YORK/WASHINGTON (APJP) -- They just don't give up, do they.

Colin Powell's Middle East tour is turning into a debacle -- he got a dressing down in Egypt, and Israel is furious with his boss the Usurper Boy.

"Shrub-Mariner-Gate" has heated up -- civilians were being disruptive, and it's looking more and more like officers on the USS Greeneville are being pressured into taking the fall for a bunch of out-of-control oil "binnissmen" with direct ties to George the Lesser acting like frat boys.  Yeah, sure -- Smirk really "cares" about our men in uniform unless they might prove his supporters an embarrassment.

Tony Blair told the world he uses the same toothpaste that keeps Smirk's smirk pearly-white.

And, of course, there was that spy flap and something about some presidential pardons.

So what did the pundits focus on? Presidential pardons, primarily -- with the FBI spy flap a distant second-place story.

From: Gloria Lalumia Re: Pundit Pap from Saturday night--Judith Regan on the FAUX News Channel Judith Regan has usually been the one FOX News Channel host who has run a pretty interesting show, largely free of the wild partisanship of most of the other FNC shows. Tonight, I witnessed the most horrible thing I have yet seen. Yes, it involved Bill Clinton. Regan looked straight into the camera and for almost 10 minutes, delivered a pseudo stream-of-consciousness poetry riff mocking Clinton.  Referring to his sad boyhood, she mocked his loneliness, then proclaimed that he built himself up and called himself KING, because "I am rich and I can do what I want!" She likened him to the cast out Socks, and envisioned him an old man meeting up with Socks at 125th street, both holding tin cups.  Over and over again, she spit out the word KING, mocking his childhood, his manhood and his humanity. In the meantime, clips of Bill played in the background. She described him alone without his handlers, no mother, no father, his wife in NY while Monica Lewinsky slept in the same city.  Then she started in on Hugh Rodham, and proclaimed this was the time of PIGS, just spitting out the word over and over. There were other vicious words, but I can't recall them. I think I blocked them out. It was incredibly malicious. What was especially appalling was the manner in which she took the most painful aspects of Bill's background -- for example, his truly grievous childhood -- and twisted them, using them to mock him. If this wasn't the "politics of personal destruction" I don't know how else you could describe this horrific display. I have never seen anything like it. The venom so plainly unmasked. It was so frightening that it left me sick to my stomach. After a break, she called in the reinforcements, a PR guy from Los Angeles, the Bragman in Bragman, Nyman, Carafella. He trashed Bill -- specifically the pardons -- as Regan piled on, mocking Bill's NYT op ed piece. Bragman said that we were now seeing Bill Clinton "as he really is" without his "handlers." Regan commented that if he had left right away, perhaps he could have avoided all this. This stupid comment, of course, blames the media frenzy as practiced by FOX and all the others on Bill Clinton, as if he DELIBERATELY decided to create the present furor. Regan then asked about Hillary -- and Bragman trashed her. The only thing remotely NOT anti-Bill was Bragman's comment that "Bush is doing the right thing, just being the happy idiot we all know him to be..." and a few moments later, saying that if you saw the press conference you would have noticed that Bush is already using the Grecian formula, so "he's starting to change, too." But the Bush comments didn't make up for the savaging of Bill that had gone before. Ironically, the next segment involved a woman discussing abuse, followed by a segment with Lorna Luft talking about how Judy Garland was "abused by the studio system at age 12." What a juxtaposition -- to have seen Regan crucify Bill using his terrible childhood as the weapon, only to see her do a complete about-face during two subsequent segments in which she played the sympathetic interviewer discussing abuse. How bizarre to see, after a clip of Judy singing, Regan asking Luft "Don't you want to cry when you see that??" To you, Judith Regan, I say, "Your cruelty is surpassed only by your hyocrisy." Following Regan's speech, I immediately had to switch channels because I was shaken, so I didn't catch whom the next guest discussing abuse  would be....Only later in the evening, when I was flipping channels did I find out who it was. The next guest turned out to be the second wife of Jim Bakker! And after telling her story, the camera pans to Jim Bakker himself! Regan had to know about how they were getting along with Tammy Faye and said, "Forgiveness?" whereupon Bakker, that simpering excuse for a man replies with his perpetual Cheshire Cat grin, "yes, forgiveness is the only way to go, the only way...." Which begs the question: it's OK, Judith, to embrace a CONVICTED FELON, while crucifying Bill Clinton without a shred of evidence??  The answer, of course, is YES! I also recall how the segment opened up with scenes from "Lord of the Flies" as the chubby boy is surrounded by the now ready to bounce gang of former friends and Regan going on about "surviving." At the time I was bewildered, but it seems she must consider Clinton capable of doing ANYTHING to survive....since he is so EVIL! A truly horrible and chilling thing to watch....

FAUX News Sunday
Promiscuous Burton addicted to Clinton

Tony Snow made his first priority the insinuation that Bill and Hillary Clinton were involved in some sort of conspiracy to sell pardons.

Tony did not even sound enthusiastic about pursuing the topic -- and talking with guest one, obsessed Clinton-hating, promiscuous, melon-shooting name-caller Dan "Clinton's a scumbag" Burton -- but first, Tony spewed a stream of RNC pseudo-factual "spin points" straight from the RNC.

Tony asked if some of the pardons could be revoked -- apparently, black Republican Bob Barr (R-Delusional) thinks they can.  But pardons are the sole power of the President -- procedural objections will not stand up in court.

Burton insinuated that Marc Rich had paid off Clinton through his library -- a stupid idea, considering Rich gave a piddling few hundred thousand out of tens of millions of bucks.

Burton also called his critics "attack dogs" -- and Brit Hume said that Burton has stopped part of his work in deference to Mary Jo White, who has launched her own investigation into the Rich pardon.  Burton insinuated that because she is a Clinton appointee, she might not be trusted -- will he try to investigate her, we can only ask?

Burton said that Rich traded with Iran and Iraq.  Somehow, he never managed that Cheney was doing business in Teheran through a Halliburton subsidiary.

Hume asked if Burton was getting death threats and if so how he is dealing with them.  Hey Brit, have you asked Senator Clinton if she's gotten any death threats lately?

Burton intends to call Beth Nolan and -- once again -- Jack Quinn before his McCarthyite committee.  He also bad-mouthed Hugh Rodham, implying that he and the Clintons were all in on some kind of fix concerning the pardon of a major cocaine dealer -- and Tony hinted that phone calls by Rodham from the White House might constitute a "scandal."

Bullshit -- Rodham was doing his job.  His mistake was not disclosing to the Clintons his full role.

Tony asked if he expects cooperation from Burton's Democrats.  Burton lied -- saying he is trying to cooperate with Waxman.

That is a lie -- and we know that from one of our congressional sources.  We'd love to get Burton under oath and ask him that question -- along with dozens of others that would prove he has lied and lied repeatedly to the American people using such vehicles as FNS and Meet the Press.

Burton assumes that because there is a GOP pretender occupying the White House, people will take him seriously and his status and power are on the rise.  The truth is that many within the GOP consider him a pariah and menace so obsessed with getting Clinton that he is undermining the credibility and stature of the party -- and want to see him stripped of his chairmanship.

Next topic: a Russian spy in the FBI. Guests: Sens. Richard Shelby and Bob Graham.  Is it the worst spy case yet?  Shelby said it looks bad.  Will we have to retool the computer system at the FBI?  Graham essentially said yes, to increase security and monitor users.  Graham said that polygraph tests discourage spying, and there were in fact "lifestyle" issues concerning the arrested agent, Hanssen, that should have tipped off the FBI -- namely, sending his kids to a pricey Catholic school.  Shelby said that he is bothered by someone like Hanssen playing the FBI in such a smart way -- and there have to be more tools than mere polygraphs to prevent espionage.  Graham said that there is now better interdepartmental cooperation between the FBI, CIA, NSA and other intelligence organizations) in protecting secrets and sharing information.  Tony asked if the indictment is sending  a signal to the Russians --and whether Hanssen should get the death penalty for treason.  Shelby wanted to know what Hanssen's involvement in the investigation of Aldrich Ames was.

The segment was unusual for FNS: it told us nothing we did not already know, and it did not allow the Republican an opportunity to come across as a foaming-at-the-mouth hard-righter (outside of Shelby's constant calls for polygraph tests for FBI agents) -- until Tony asked the two senators if they could trust their own staffs!  Shelby essentially said, "You never know."

At the top of the next segment, Tony claimed that Bush had a "honeymoon" with the public -- is he crazy?  More than half the nation thinks the election was stolen -- but said it might end on Tuesday when he submits his first budget -- FNS code for "he's gonna get hammered."  White House budget czar Mitch Daniels said that a number of programs -- such as bringing telephones to rural areas -- will be cut.

Well, gee -- is that this "program's" present mandate?  We don't think so...

Daniels forecast economic growth (as an excuse for tax givebacks for the rich), but said growth may well slow and swallow part of the surplus.

So why tax cuts?  Daniels said little about paying down the debt, saving Joe Six-pack thousands in interest -- in most cases, more than they'd get back from Smirk in the form of a piddling tax cut.

Hume obsessed on "growing" education and defense spending -- where will cuts come?  Daniels said corporate subsidies.  What a joke -- that's not the ONLY or the PRIMARY place where there will be cuts.  Daniels even admitted that subsidies to the rapacious pharmaceutical industry would be INCREASED -- no doubt due to the sleazy efforts of their lobbying organizations, whose efforts are actually hurting the long-term picture for the industry and for the public.

Daniels hinted that the Cheney-Card Cadre may propose Medicaid "reform."  That should be something -- practically a guarantee that people who are sick and poor will be even sicker and poorer!

We skipped the panel's smug "Ex-Files" segment (this week, they dissed Hillary).

Talk turned to Bush's budget -- and the panel predicted that it would be a good day for Democrats.  Mara Liasson foresaw the need for compromise ion the tax cut issue -- but the Democrats could claim victory.

There was a very fully letter from a reader about the possibility of a twelve-step program for pundits going through Clinton withdrawal.  You don't suppose that letter came from an APJ reader, do you?

Noteworthy: FNS completely ignored Powell's failing Middle East tour and Tony Blair's meeting with The Appointed  One.

The McLaugh-In Group
Issue one: GE wants YOUR tax money! 

Issue one: rearm America!  John McLaugh-In gushed in anticipation of a pay raise for military personnel -- but then slammed Smirk for saying he'd stick to the sensible Clinton-Gore numbers.

Oh, boo-hoo-hoo! No additional boondoggle bucks for Jack Welch and GE!

John insinuated that America is over-committed and ill-prepared.  Larry Kudlow lamented the defense industry slipping from 6% to 3% of GDP.

Hey, Larry -- during that period, did you find yourself better off financially!  Our entire staff sure did.

Eleanor Clift needled Shrub for saying "help is on the way" and now cannot fund the silly missile defense scam AND a tax cut!  Michelle "Malkin" Maglalang said fiscal conservatives should NOT be surprised when His Illegitimacy said he'd make education priority one. She did slam teachers during her first comments as she praised Smirk for bad-mouthing "nation-building" and claimed that all the military does in Kosovo is deliver the mail.  Jim Warren said that humanitarian crises will outnumber military crises, and Rumsfeld has to deal with congressional turf wars over military base closings.  Kudlow, being the goofball supply-sider and ex-chemical-dependent he is, praised Reagan.

Eleanor said that if there is going to be a missile shield, there has to be a threat.  Kudlow said that some report Rumsfeld wrote is wonderful.  We're sure it is -- for GE!

Issue two: a puff-piece for Paul O'Neill, the ex-Alcoa boss who is now the Cheney-Card Cadre's Minister of the Exchequer, and a cheerleader for Usurper Boy's tax giveback to the super-rich.  But can O'Neill be a faithful water-bearer for Shrub? Eleanor said that O'Neill makes tax cut fans very nervous during hearings in January, but he will heel to Cheney's command.  Maglalang does not like O'Neill -- or Freddie Mac of Fannie Mae, highly successful programs that Maglalang slammed as big government welfare-type entitlements.  Maglalang is an Asian Republican pundit who probably revels in being "better" than members of other ethnic minorities who are living hand-to-mouth by no fault of their own.  Kudlow claimed that O'Neill is more conservative than his critics say -- and claimed that the rich generate jobs.

Yeah, sure -- this is a variation on "the rich are more productive and deserve a tax giveback" -- on the back of the hard-working Americans that actually did turn the economy around with their sweat.  The truth is that many of these super-rich don't do squat -- they let others, from upper management to blue-collar peons, do the "scut work" for them.

Issue three: Clinton's last-minute presidential "regulations" -- 8000 pages of NEW RULES!  Now Little George "must be Hercules" and have his people undo Clinton's work.  John is upset that forests cannot be paved -- with two-thirds of the west "owned" by the Federal government.  John also called emissions regulation "punitive" -- and predicted an increase in fuel prices.  Maglalang wants a waiting period on presidential proclamations -- and Kudlow predicted what GOPers like to call "the land grab" will be overturned.  Eleanor called them "political land mines" -- Shrubya will look bad overturning health and safety regulations he does it at his own risk.

Face the Nation
The Clinton pardons

You couldn't help but get the feeling that Bob Schieffer is sick of talking about Clinton.  Guest one was Sen. Arlen "I took money from Denise Rich" Specter -- who now wants to see Hugh Rodham questioned, and also says that he "needs to hear from Bill Clinton."

Hey, we agree. Clinton should tell Specter exactly where he can go for all of the bashing that's been going on -- and let Specter know that his career is over.

We predict that in the coming weeks, Specter's star will fall faster than Thompson did when he tried to dig scandal on Bill and Hillary.

Arlen spun the usual one-sided, incomplete facts on many "suspicious" events surrounding Rich.  Borger asked if Specter was going to call Hillary before his committee to talk about the pardon of some Hasidim and allegations that they were tied to support of Hillary's run by Hasidic groups.

Bob Schieffer mentioned that Time Magazine is now claiming that Roger Clinton got thousands from someone who did get a pardon, and there's talk about a joint committee. Specter likes the idea, admitting that he deferred to Clinton hater Dan Burton on some investigations.

Specter did his best to build a case -- but it is a thin, circumstantial case that is designed to fuel Clinton-haters and bamboozle the public into thinking that there's some sort of systemic corruption involving pardons.  Of course there was none -- if you want real corrupt pardons, you have to go back to Bush Daddy killing the Iran-Contra investigations on December 25, 1992.

Richard Shelby was the next guest.  Unlike his FNS appearance he previewed hearings concerning the Hanssen debacle and praised Louis Freeh (who needs a few good words in light of Freeh's failure; he should resign or be fired) -- but like the FNS segment, he talked polygraphs, polygraphs, polygraphs.  Former Defense secretary Bill Cohen said that the polygraph is not foolproof -- and Hanssen was a very crafty and savvy spy, keeping himself heavily removed from Soviet and Russian spies.  Schieffer asked if there was a tie between the Hanssen and Ames cases -- was Hanssen investigating Ames?  Shelby does not know.  Schieffer mentioned Cohen's having written spy novels -- can it be stopped?  Cohen, of course, said no -- but there has to be greater control, compartmentalization, and tracking of computer use.

In the final segment, Schieffer chatted with dirty trickster Karl Rove.  Schieffer wanted to dish the Clinton pardons, especially the idea of a joint Congressional committee -- but Rove was there to promote the great tax giveback.  How can anyone project the surpluses that "justify" the cuts?  Rove, like his puppet Smirk, did not answer the question directly at first -- he started with lofty and empty rhetoric, then started talking budgets and reserves.  Rove motormouthed his answers, mostly projecting a good future in contrast to Shrub's "warning light" comments regarding the economy.  Gloria Borger brought up millionaire Pat  Robertson's whining objection to Moonies and Scientologists getting "faith-based" money.  Rove says that only programs that work will get money -- but did not say word one on how success of programs would be determined.

Schieffer's final word -- he expressed "distaste" for Clinton's goodbye from Andrews AFB, then slammed the pardons. relatives and gifts.

Oh, please, Bob -- enough!  Didn't you spend months "sniffing Bill Clinton's trousers?  You're really one to talk.  If you'd start doing your homework, you'd be expressing distaste for the press, so eager to pick up on spin points from the RNC as "objective news" and sell trumped-up scandal for ad dollars rather than seeing that Marc Rich's pardon was justified, especially given Rudy "Cancer Boy" Giuliani's discredited use of RICO.  A little actual journalistic effort on your part might do you some good.

Defeat the Press
Starring Tim "Addicted to Clinton" Russert

I may be getting older, but it strikes me that idiots like Andrew Lack (of balance) and Tim Russert might think about attempting to resurrect the reputation of Meet the Press -- not as the adjunct of the National Inquirer it now is, but as the serious policy talk show it once was. Look at the line-up today:

First came Sen. Christopher Shays, so much the mild-mannered snake that one just wants to strangle him, to do a hatchet job on Bill Clinton for a half-dozen pardons he made without GOP permission -- although no place in the Constitution allows for such oversight. He then invited none other that Chaka Fattah, a black congressman with his heart in the right place -- but a poorer spokesperson for Clinton could not have been found.

Shays, who looks like a throwback "ponce" from the turn of the twentieth century (so studied is his All-Brooks-Brothers-all-the-time look), was quick to call Clinton everything but a serial killer for using his UNRESTRICTED pardon power.

That's right – UNRESTRICTED.

Shays also defended, if you can believe it, the stereotypical right-wing psychopath: Congress-nut Dan Burton. Shays kept invoking Jimmy Carter, assuming his name would imply integrity – when in fact Carter is the president that not only brought to BCCI America on a plate but cost you $100 billion -- that's BILLION -- to rescue that stupid greedy bank, but also pushed BCCI around the world to developing nations, whose leaders were a lot more ganja-and-girls and a lot less Harvard-MIT.

Who gives a flying toss what Jimmy Carter says? He's nothing but a guilt-ridden multimillionaire who spends his time doing re-runs of "THIS OLD CHEPACHET HOUSE -- for the poor in a crummy neighborhood"

Shays, a whining woman at the best of times, peers at Russert through his golden wire rims (not solid gold, of course) and spews his memorized Clinton indictment-of-the-month. But hilariously enough, it sounded more like an indictment of our much overpaid Vice President Dick "Mr. Glum" Cheney. Shays, furious that he lives in a lackluster house in D.C. and a near-shanty in Connecticut, hates Rich because he's rich. While Shays spends his time sitting around waiting to appear on cheap-shot talk shows like Russet's, Rich is taking his Gulfstream V to Rio for a week of fun with his latest super-model. Shays says that Rich not only did what Exxon and others did (they weren't indicted, by the way) but that he also traded with Iraq and Iran!!

Well, read Mac MacArthur's exposé and call for impeachment of Dick Cheney for far worse -- INCLUDING trading with Iraq and Iran using a phony scam corporate shell in the Caymans called Halliburton Services Ltd. (The "Ltd." is a dead giveaway that the company is a scam or a money laundering operation as it was and still is for Halliburton, some say). 

It was really a snore.

Face it, you fascist A-holes: Clinton could have pardoned HITLER and you couldn't do a thing about it. So all your whiny cries of foul don't mean beans to the American people who have your number -- and that number is NAZI propaganda machine straight out of Goering and Himmler. If you don't believe me, read about them. So stop wasting our money with your asinine investigations of your political opponents. This is not life or death -- we all live in the USA and we are all Americans -- and being conservative does not mean you are on the side of God, and being liberal doesn't either. The truth is that 98% of all politicians in American and around the world are filthy, greedy, criminal representatives who would kill their own mothers just to keep a lousy seat in Congress -- a place where most of the population are merely failed lawyers who couldn't get a job.

Shays is so stupid that he quoted that well-known paid whore for the GOP, Paul "Gigolo" Gigot of the Wall Street Journal. The only black person that Gigot knows intimately is likely the guy who shines his shoes, yet he wrote that Clinton's pardon of Mark Rich will somehow make black Americans rise up and smell the roses of the GOP!!! -- at least parenthetically.

Well, I do have black friends. Some are professors and doctors and lawyers, some are musicians, and some are working class guys and gals, and if you think they are EVEN THINKING about Mark Rich and Bill Clinton you are as out of your mind as Gigot and Shays.

Forget it, Republi-"cons!" The pardons stick -- and unless you have film and sound of Clinton taking money as he signs his name to a pardon or commutation, you are spinning your wheels as usual.

However, I would suggest, in the spirit of the new BushBrat bipartisanship, that Mr. Shays begin looking first at the Reagan, and then the Daddy Bush pardons. That should keep you busy for a decade or so. Then I think he should take a very long and deep look at Dick Cheney and his criminal activity between 1988 and today. Ask yourself, Dan Burton: how did Dick Cheney go from a poorly paid government hack all his life to a multigazillion dollar yearly salary, and a 50 million dollar severance package working for an oil services company that was nearly bankrupt a decade ago? Ask yourself how that happens!

Bob Kerrey -- a United States Senator for so many years -- is earning maybe a couple hundred thousand as the President of that phony university in New York, The New School... so how did Cheney and that treacherous little bug-eyed harridan wife of his land near the top of the FORTUNE 100 political hacks?

Russert, throughout this hilariously misleading discussion filled with lies and disinformation, kept up the "pressure" -- prodding his GOP guests to really go after Clinton and his wife. Over and over again, he suggested subpoenaing the Clintons or volunteering them to go before Burton!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha -- just like Gerald Ford! Well, Jerry -- who happens to be a great guy -- learned to do what he was told, and he did. That's why you never hear from him any longer.

Then Shays topped off his ten minutes by saying that "IF YOU PLEAD THE FIFTH AMENDMENT, YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY GUILTY."

What a laughingstock Shays is – that was proof that he thinks we are living in France. Well it ain't that way, you little pantywaist -- in truth, Mr. Shays, pleading the 5th has NOTHING to do with guilt. So says the Constitution of the United States. Most often this plea is made -- particularly in front of creeps like you -- to protect others from harm – or have you forgotten the McCarthy era, only topped by the Shays-Burton-Spector era, which looks more like a trial of Jews before Adolf Eichmann.

Shays then turned on Hillary Clinton because Bill pardoned a couple of Hasidic Rabbis -- not "Hassids" as Shays refers to them, who evidently set up a "school" and took Fed money in a white collar crime, which they did not use in the way the government commanded. Bill pardoned them -- and SURPRISE, SURPRISE - the entire Hasidic community in that area, all 1,400 of them, voted for Hillary instead of Neo-Nazi Rick "Arafat Handshake" Lazio. Now, let me point out that Hasidic Jews are so far out on the edge of Judaism here in the U.S. -- or anywhere but in some quarters in Israel, where they are warmongering lunatics that attempt over and over again to take the reins of government (and fairly successfully too). Hasidim are very pragmatic and excellent business people. So, when Clinton pardoned a couple of guys who had already spent too long in prison compared to so many other white collar "Christian" criminals, they ordered the women to vote for Clinton. The men already knew they had to do this from the local Rebbe ("king" of the other Hasidic rabbis in the region). But, elsewhere, Hasidim voted for Lazio. Well, did he pay them off, too? You bet your ass he did. As I said, these are pragmatic and very smart people. Why not look into Lazio's near 100% win in two other Hassidic districts?

Russert, not moved by any intelligent, moral, humane, or ethical argument, then asked whether the Clintons will "release their former staff members from the executive privilege oaths they took" -- so (hopefully to Russert) they will turn on the Clintons and show those home movies of Bill and Hillary taking briefcases full of cash as they signed each pardon!

Ha, ha, ha, ha. Russert is bozo and ought to move to Boynton Beach to become part of the news team at the National Inquirer -- which is, by the way, right up his alley.

Russert then spent as little time as possible on Bush Baby's phony tax package -- and avoided altogether Smirk's even more hilarious budget.

Remember LEAVE NO CHILD BEHIND? Maybe, if you'll excuse the term, he meant leave no child's behind -- because Bush is now screwing all those children with an addition to the education budget of a puny 11% -- less than each of the past four years under Clinton! Oh yeah -- remember his pledge to the Pentagon? Well, they got a 4% hike! Yowzah! That means that both got negative money this year!

Why?

Because the bogus POTUS is going to use all the NON-surplus to give his friends TAX CUTS -- and screw the poor student, the aged and the military on food stamps, all three of them

Russert pushed the tax-break "trigger" idea El Smirko's Chief Handler, Andy Card – who said, hey man, no triggers.

Russert, in a silly effort to "prove" he is really a fair guy, asked whether His Illegitimacy will still push to drill in Alaska protected areas. Hey, Tim -- is the Pope Catholic?

Anyway, except for more blather from the crumbling remains of the ancient David Broder -- who has become, aside from being brain-dead, a born-again Jewish conservative who hates Clinton -- Russert had nothing more to offer.

As if he ever had.

This Weak
"Scam" Donaldson raises Karl Rove's blood pressure

You gotta hand it to Sam "Scam" Donaldson -- he knows how to titillate.

The two big ideas he had that were actually more entertaining than Russert today were:

1. Have a serious and respectful interview with Dan Burton, the Creature from the Indiana Lagoon.

2. Show a local interview of Hugh Rodham in front of his shack in Florida attempting to look cagey.

The interview with Burton was, of course, a farce. Burton, under the wing of a new media adviser (for what purpose we can't imagine – let's be real, this moron doesn't actually think he could run for the Senate, does he?), now acts professorial and even-keeled (Maybe he is on the new psychotropic antidepressant drug from Organon).

Hugh Rodham was better. He is fat slob living in a $15 thousand house in Coral Gables where he appeared on the lawn in a Black Polo Shirt and just kept saying-- to everything -- "YOU KNOW THAT?" or "That's NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" It was hilarious -- this went on for several minutes, and poor Hillary must have been breaking vases by the time it was over. Rodham came off as the slimiest piece of crap you could imagine -- even though I know he is a well-educated, likable and decent guy. But he really appeared to have lost his marbles because the press was camping out in front of his ghetto house. It looked just like the one that that Cuban kid Elian Gonzalez was living in in Miami -- except not as neat or well-gardened (and no sixty-foot crucifix).

Then Karl Rove came on and Scam -- who secretly hates Bush's guts -- gave him a tough time, asking why the Bush Brat Liar doesn't call off the dogs like Burton, Shays, and Spector. Rove, just as a Gestapo agent would, simply said that Bush Baby set the example (he has been quite a gentleman over these so-called scandals, hasn't he? Could he be scared of some scandals of his own or what?) and the others should follow -- but that Congress has it's own models or some such. 

Scam repeated this theme over and over -- and you could see the veins on Rove's head start throbbing. But he kept his cool (just as any SS officer would). He too said NO TRIGGER on the tax cuts. Is Bush planning to destroy his own tax cut bill by blaming the GOP for trying to pass something? You bet he is. He already knows that a tax cut of the size he is planning would be ruinous to the nation -- just as it was under Reagan. In the long term, huge tax cuts only result in deficit spending. Remember that. Didn't Reagan-Bush leave us trillions in debt until Clinton paid it off? I think so.

So Bush doesn't want any tax cuts. He is making certain however that he can veto whatever these morons send him. That's the plan.

George Will was more of an idiot than usual this week -- AND he didn't have his one-on-one interviews as he has in the past weeks. I guess ABC saw that applause meter stalling at ZERO during those segments!

Will said that the media (which includes him) is condescending to Republican Presidents. Well, George -- hate to tell you, but the talk this week (and every week for more than a year now) is, as usual "Is Bush Baby and idiot?" George, did you see his first press conference -- hastily arranged so it wouldn't be covered? Bush didn't even know what a tank was, or what a submarine is. C'mon. The press is not condescending at all to GOP Presidents. They sure weren't to Dick Nixon -- the only Republican with a mind (an evil one) since Abe Lincoln. The fact is that the press knows a moron when they see one. That includes Ford, Reagan, Daddy Bush, and now the Bush Brat.

Simple as that.

I won't even get into the round table. It was so boring that we were trying to determine whether Staphylococcus had read our comments about his dye job. Cokie sure did and lightened her hair a week ago -- and didn't we see a tiny touch of gray in the Stash's coif?

That was it for Scam and, of course, Cocky. 

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