Pundit Pap
for Sunday, July 21
The markets have no confidence in Smirk... but you wouldn't know by watching the talk shows!
by The Pundit Pap Team
July 21, 2002 -- New York/Washington/Chicago (APJP, updated July 21, 3:30 PM) -- You've gotta love the Sunday press gang.
The top story of the week, of course, was the floundering stock market -- and the pundit prevaricators went out of their way to discuss every reason except the most obvious: a vote of no confidence in Prince George and his Insider Trading Insiders.
Here's what we caught this week:
FAUX News Sunday
Tony Snow's first guest was FAUX News Channel's business "journalist" (snicker) Neil "All Is Well, Don't Panic" Cavuto, who was on hand to reassure FAUX's largely conservative viewership that the world -- well, the world of profitable investment in stocks, at least - was not coming to an end. In this respect Cavuto did a less-than convincing job -- in fact, he had to admit that what had occurred last week was a "precipitous" drop in the markets.
Tony rattled off a litany of "investor concerns" for Cavuto to spin: dishonest bookkeeping, overvalued stocks, jitters over what Congress is doing.
Congress? CONGRESS? Nice try, Tony, but the jitters are in fact over what Harken Boy George, Halliburton Dick and their circle of pals are NOT doing: getting serious about corrupt accounting firms, dumping Harvey "Conflict of Interest" Pitt, releasing the SEC's paper trail on Harken (and Big Time Dick's secret energy papers), and demanding complete honesty in corporate statements.
At least Tony did admit that August 14 is the date that the White House is really worried about -- a due date for corporations to file financial statements. Cavuto admitted there is a real concern about the accuracy of earnings statements and projections.
The biggest sign of problems in Smirkville materialized in the form of eternal optimist Cavuto being only cautiously optimistic about Monday morning (as other market pundits are telling their viewers to prepare for at least a little market turbulence).
Then Tony turned to his panel of "economics" experts -- Brit Hume, Juan Williams, Mara Liasson and Bill Kristol. FAUX News Sunday has been bringing on the panel early on in what looks like a format shift engineered to reinforce Shrub-friendly spin with "instant reaction". Hume said he'd bought some stocks this weekend -- then made fun of average investors for thinking the Sarbanes bill that Snippy has promised to sign will help the markets.
It was a typical display of arrogance and dismissiveness from Hume. If anything, the real hand-wringing is happening in boardrooms, whose occupants may not have to be honest and accountable under the letter of the law - but now find themselves under increasing scrutiny and pressure from stockholders of all stripes.
Tony played a video bite of "President" Greenspan supporting and urging action by Congress -- and Kristol said that Greenspan spoke, Congress spoke and the markets dropped some 400 points, adding that the markets are worried about Congress.
Huh? We have an incompetent in the White House who opened his yap twice this week and offered nothing but platitudes that triggered the first slides early in the week. Stockholders now believe they are dealing with crooks in corporate boardrooms inflating the price of stocks -- and you think the markets are worried about Congress (read: Democrats)? They're a hell of a lot more worried about the Imbecile Prince, who seems intent on "kinder, gentler" regulations and covering his ass on his own history of insider trading.
Juan skewered Kristol's spin by pointing out that investors see their 401(k)s tanking while execs make a killing, and Smirk had better move now. Tony tried to act as if suggesting such a thing were heresy, but Juan stood his ground: corporate leadership has to get honest.
Hume cynically said that Congress is legislating in the face of "a house burning down" -- but of course avoided the reason the fire started in the first place. A clip of the Pretend-ident followed, and Mara started talking about polls and Democrats counting on consumer confidence dropping -- as if polls were somehow evil (so why does Smirk so reliant on them?). She also hinted that Doofus's advisors are cautioning him not to move too fast. Tony brought up Gore's scathe of Smirk and his economic policies last evening -- acting as if Gore had no right to tout the fact that he and Clinton did a damn good job of shepherding the economy through a few ups and downs, but largely helped give the nation eight years of prosperity, including the usually left-out middle class. Kristol seemed to tick off Hume by admitting that reforms are needed, and quick.
Hume then shocked us as he laid out Prince George's real desire: get all other issues off the table so he can have his war on terror (read: proceed with his ill-considered invasion of Iraq so his binniss buddies can have all that oil). Kristol added an interesting zinger: had Greenspan come across tougher on corporate America, the markets might've actually gone up.
Following the break: homeland secret police... er, um, security!
The guest: Tom "Brown Alert" Ridge, who has managed to hold onto his job as has most of Smirk's inner circle of handlers.
Tony was ready with some silly numbers from a FAUX poll asking whether people fear being attacked by terrorists. Ridge gave his boilerplate, scripted dronings claiming the "people" were "reassured" by his new agency which would "preserve our way of life" against "the new threat of the 21st century".
Of course, nothing could be further from the truth: Ridge, Ass-KKKroft and Snippy seem intent on trashing civil liberties and turning Americans against one another -- but you'll never see anyone bring up the executive branch's appalling record on human rights at home on any FAUX "news" broadcast.
Tony asked about the man arrested at a Detroit airport with $12 million in bogus checks. What could Al Qaeda be doing with that much money?
Slick move, Tony - declare the guy a "tairist" on the thinnest of evidence. Suddenly, this idiot taken into custody with a slew of forged checks must be a key member of Al Qaeda - and that may well be true, but it looks like you and FAUX are trying the same gambit your network did with the "dirty bomber" who turned out to be pretty much an Al Qaeda errand boy instead of an evil genius bomb-maker.
Ridge, naturally, slammed terrorists and lauded cooperation between law enforcement agencies without answering the question. Tony said that there are rumors of a cell trying to construct some sort of bomb; Ridge said it is not unlikely that Al Qaeda is here and up to something (well, duh, Tommy!).
From there the interview deteriorated into a stream of dull blather: talk about globalization, the oil business, fighting a global terrorist network... all with the spin of "gimme the power, we need the authority to fight these evil evildoers, just fork over your rights."
Tony admitted that even hard-right GOPers like Dick Armey are objecting to all the deputization (read: snitches out to harass liberals). Ridge said there the House committee has given Smirk what he wants, Lieberman is bound to mark up the Senate version of the bill, and there is a need to focus. Tony asked if the Bogus POTUS would veto the bill if it turns out to be larded with amendments; Ridge gave a non-answer about Congress focusing on what the executive branch needs to create this massive agency (translation: give us what we want, please!). Tony gave the number in the agency: over 170,000 who would NOT have civil servant status; Ridge gave lip service to worker advocacy and protections (yeah, sure - as if your anti-labor pals in the GOP really feel that way).
Tony then brought up the issue of revoking posse comitatus, as one John Bircher general has proposed. Ridge said it's out of the question in advance of a serious incident -- but the issue of calling up the National Guard is open as is revoking Posse Comitatus.
That's NOT good news.
Following the break, Tony welcomed Sen. Joe Biden (D-DE) -- and in answer to the Posse Comitatus question, Biden more or less agreed -- but ONLY in the case of a major terror incident involving weapons of mass destruction, and PROHIBITING arrest power for the military.
That's STILL not good news. Biden did give one underlying argument: the military's expertise in the area of dealing with such weapons, and that may be true - but the military should only act in an advisory capacity.
Tony turned to Saddam -- and Biden supports deposing Saddam and a policy focused toward deposing Saddam. Hume asked if he would support a resolution toward using military force, but Biden said no -- at least at this time. Biden said that he intends to hold hearings into what to do, and there are some important questions: what sort of threat does he pose? And what happens when he's gone? Who takes over (translation: will it be Taliban time)?
These are questions you will not see on "fair and balanced" FAUX News - unless a Democrat asks them. FAUX seems hell-bent on supporting full-scale war with Saddam.
Biden said the responsibility is for Team Smirk to convince Biden and Congress that they have a realistic plan to deal with Iraq, and we are not dealing with Afghanistan -- Iraq is a sophisticated and militarily powerful nation, and going in could open up "a world of hurt". Biden also said that there is no sign of a threat of imminent attack by Iraq against the US -- and historically the US has not initiated a massive attack without an imminent threat. Hume hypothesized an alliance between Al Qaeda and Saddam -- and Biden said that if it can be proven, then yes, that might be grounds for military action.
Talk turned to judge Priscilla Owen, judicial extremist and anti-choice zealot -- Biden said that he will be attending hearings into Owen. Hume asked if she has the temperament and mind for the court. Biden said she has the intellect, but seems to have gone beyond the law in her rulings. Hume asked if he considers her an activist, and Tony implied that she is under attack. Biden responded that he's not surprised that she is, given the contentious environment over judicial nominees (translation: the GOP having blocked Clinton's moderate nominees).
In the roundtable, Tony and Hume MISCHARACTERIZED Biden's position as "coming around" to Bush's position on Saddam -- when in fact, Biden said he'd damn well better have a plan, an end game, and proof that Saddam poses an imminent threat. Mara laid that out, but Kristol started gushing about bipartisan war fever -- and Smirk is moving on Iraq. Kristol forecast hard-hitting hearings just after Labor Day -- and action before next year. Juan said the misadministration has failed to make the case against Saddam publicly -- they seem to be stretching to construct a case, and it has to be proven that Saddam is a threat to global stability, otherwise Smirk runs the danger of "wagging the dog". Hume said Smirk can go ahead and attack Saddam based on his "Sept. 11" authority if there's an Al Qaeda link -- and Congress will say yes if asked. Mara brought up the big dangers: high casualties and a commitment to (that dreaded term for right wingers) nation building. Kristol is all in favor of post-Saddam nation building; Hume said it had better be "democracy" (read: oil-igarchy).
Finally, Tony turned to the vote by a House committee to expel Jim Traficant -- and played a video litany of the convicted Congress-nut's most outrageous sound-bites from the committee hearings.
We're going to miss his lunacy. Based on the stream of semi-vulgarities Traficant spewed, FAUX could have had a huge prime-time hit -- it was far more entertaining than "Who Wants to Marry a Multimillionaire"!
Tony's final word was a blast at "Hollywood values" somehow being tied to the sicko who raped and killed a six-year-old this week in California.
Come on, Tony -- we found the story as horrifying and sick as you did, but tying it to the entertainment industry is a non-sequitur -- not to mention a nonstarter.
-- JJ Balzer
McLaugh-In
Issue one: Alan's optimism! John McLaughlin treated us to a few choice clips of President Greenspan's optimistic Wednesday testimony -- in contrast to one of Smirk's acolytes who predicts less growth than Greenspan, who called the economy "Resilient, efficient and flexible."
Larry Kudlow mostly agrees with Greenspan -- but blamed Congress for hurting the market by trying to get companies to eliminate crime. Kudlow pushed (predictably) for more tax cuts (but that's about ALL he does on TV, be it McLaugh-In or his show on CNBC). Eleanor Clift said that it was boardroom misconduct, not regulation, that hurt the markets - and the tanking market spells trouble for the economy. John said that houses, real estate, gold and bonds are doing well as investments. Tony said that Greenspan was being optimistic in the face of jitters, and little investors are panicking according to the stockbrokers he has spoken with. McLaugh-In irregular Gerry Baker from the Financial Times said Greenspan was on the mark -- the economy is doing well, but the questions are whether or not the jitters become a rout and whether or not it has an impact on consumer spending. Is there a lynch mob salivating for corporate blood on Capitol Hill? Baker said no, Kudlow kept interrupting "yes". Kudlow said that "the market" is concerned that a "scrub" of income statements will impact profit statements (well, boo hoo, Larry -- honesty sucks doesn't it). Eleanor said that sending crooked corporate officers to jail is good in the long run.
John asked when market stability would be achieved.
Larry: In the weeks after August 14.
Eleanor: Three weeks.
Tony: If I knew I'd be investing or disinvesting.
Gerry: I don't know because we don't know how far balance sheet scams go.
John: Only God know and SHE has not told us!
Issue two: Boardroom Bad Boys Behind Bars (which sounded like a great B-movie title to us). John detailed the House and Senate bills to rein in corporate crimes. Greenspan and Paul Volcker are not very enthusiastic about the legislation -- nor is Tony, who called it grandstanding. Eleanor pointed out that people want CEOs reined in; Larry is not looking forward to prosecutions of white-collar criminals (no doubt many of them being his pals), and while he admitted it might be necessary, Larry wants "growth orientation" (i.e. tax cuts -- does he EVER get off that topic? Or is he just obsessive-compulsive?). Gerry said that the GOP hopes that the bill will be forgotten and the issue will disappear -- but if there are more big corporate scandals, it will come back to haunt the GOP. Tony believes that the scandals will trigger"anti-incumbency" sentiments.
Is there a provision that will trigger a veto?
Larry: No.
Eleanor: No.
Tony: No.
Gerry: There are problems with the bill -- George should veto it but won't.
John: Politics trumps policy -- he won't veto.
Each week during this, its 20th year, John has been playing a McLaughlin moment to remind us how much (or how little) his encounter group for frustrated conservatives has come. This week we were treated to discussion of the 1987 stock market "correction" and the group's reactions to the underlying reason. Surprisingly, Bob "Sunshine" Novak agreed, with a frown on his face, that it was a vote of no confidence in Reagan!
Issue three: Saddam taunts Junior! Turkey has given a conditional OK to letting the US use its territory for military action if we forgive their debt, but every other nation in the region has said no -- even Kuwait, by saying an attack on wily ol' Saddam must be under the auspices of the UN. Putin has said no -- and saluted Saddam by wishing him health and success in overcoming his people's problems (but that sounds more like a velvet-covered warning to us). If Smirk invades, what is the impact on the economy? Gerry said possible turmoil -- stocks down, oil up, profits down. "Does that drain any hawkishness out of your veins, Tony?" Tony said the benefits outweigh the temporary economic problems. Eleanor pointed out that the US had no "staying power" in Afghanistan, and is not likely to have it in Iraq. Gerry said that UK editorials are unfavorable (to say the least!).
Who stays in longer?
Larry predicted that Smirk will take the oil fields of Iraq -- and it's good for the stock market (and that's what it's all about, boys and girls - oil, black gold, Texas tea)!
Eleanor: Where's the plan?
Tony: We'll go in, Saddam will be out.
Gerry: Bush will outlive Saddam, but the rest of the world is not in the right state for a war.
John: Saddam will cave in to an inspection regime and there will be no invasion!
Last call for punditry!
Larry: Profits and economy rise before summer is out.
Eleanor: The 2004 GOP convention goes to New York, the Democrats to Boston.
Tony: SEC chair Harvey Pitt will be fired!
Gerry: Cheney not on ticket in 2004, he's "not the right man."
John: The next foreign policy crisis will occur in Pakistan, as Musharraf's regime unravels.
-- JJ Balzer
Meet the Putz
Tim Russert joined the rest of the pundit elite in his focus on the persistent stock market decline.
His first guest: New York Stock Exchange Chairman Dick Grasso, who pinned the problem on companies that have been dishonest with stockholders and the public. Grasso said economic fundamentals are very good, but the boardrooms have to send a message of high ethics and honest performance when it comes to investor money. He then tried to reassure skittish investors by emphatically stating that the market has returned 30-50% better returns than fixed investments for the last century.
Tim wanted to know the percentage of institutional investors in the market, suggesting that they were less than scrupulous, but Grasso deflated Tim's question as he pointed out these large institutional funds represent millions of investors. Tim reminded Grasso that he had predicted that Smirk's comments would stabilize the market -- and asked him to amend his statement! Grasso instead stuck to his guns, saying we have to "wage a war against terrorism in the boardroom... bad guys have to be rooted out of the system."
Now that was rich, and even Tim looked surprised! Characterizing all those nice Republican CEOs and board members as terrorists! That line may well have people buzzing through the current news cycle.
Would it help if CEOs went to prison? Yes, said Grasso. Should accounting firms be banned from consulting? Grasso said yes -- it is impossible to both audit honestly and act as a consultant. Auditors and audit committees must be held responsible. What will happen on August 14th? Grasso said he'd be surprised if any companies renege on their financials -- in fact, companies will jump at the chance to be honest.
Is the average investor losing confidence in the stock market? No, said Grasso, "It's always darkest before the dawn," and investors, he predicted, will be patient.
What happens tomorrow? Grasso said Mondays following difficult Fridays are usually not great, and tomorrow may be no different. How long before it bottoms out? Grasso said his experts say it's near bottom, but he's not going to commit to it.
Tim then welcomed Dick "Lame Duck" Armey, who for once looked tan and sober. In keeping with the present "blame and burn" GOP strategy, Armey immediately tried to condemn Democrats for politicizing the economy (read: taking constituent concerns over boardroom scandals seriously). Tim confronted Armey on yesterday's New York Times article about GOPers abandoning Smirk on many issues -- and another article on GOPers going ahead of Smirk on boardroom reform. Armey tried to tie the Clinton-hating NY Times to Democrat "hopes for failure" of the Smirk regime and GOP politics. He kept trying to "shame" Democrats for playing politics.
It was all pretty pathetic. Now that Armey is set to retire, he has nothing to lose -- and it's obvious he's auditioning for the part of lobbyist for hard-right businessmen and interests, probably in the arena of accounting or financial services.
And Tim surely sensed this. He then fired away at Armey for blocking accounting reform - Tim was so nasty you'd almost think he was talking to a Democrat! And Armey whined about being under "political" attack.
Not for much longer, Dick, not for much longer.
Does Armey now support banning accounting firms from both auditing and consulting? Pretty much yes, but once the "crime and punishment" phase is over, Armey called for "reforming" retirement funding. Armey would NOT answer directly as to whether he wants to privatize Social Security -- even though he still does.
Tim then verbally bitch-slapped Armey and his colleagues for voting themselves a raise; Armey tried in vain to call it an "adjustment for inflation" and whined about how hard his colleagues work (read: he's stressed and deserves the raise).
Tim then turned to "homeland security" and a headline that Transportation Secretary Norm Mineta said that all checked airline bags will be screened by the end of the year -- and now Armey's gang wants a one-year delay. Armey buttered up "hard working" Mineta, then claimed that airports say they are not going to be ready, then demanded we "recognize the problem... this is a simple matter of being realistic."
And Tim would not let up: "This will put Americans at risk." Armey stupidly said there is a bigger danger from a false sense of security.
Huh? I'd rather wait on line than be blown out of the air by a bomb in some checked baggage, Dick - and most Americans would agree with that.
Tim then turned to the "TIPS" program, which we believe actually stands for "Turn In Progressives & Semites". Tim slammed it; Armey said he respects Smirk but has big questions about the plan.
Score one for Dick! That's the closest we'll ever come to hearing him say anything negative about the Moron Prince -- "big questions" - but at least he said it.
Tim then brought up a Wall Street Journal editorial calling for Smirk to call the whole Homeland Security mess off and reconsider it down the road. Armey said it's a good thing we are not governed by newspaper people.
And for once we agree with Armey. If that were the case, the government would STILL be fishing for Clinton sex scandals.
Will whistle blowers be protected within the Department of Homeland Security? Armey said absolutely. Will they get civil service protection? Armey said he supports it.
There was some boring chat about the "kinder, gentler Armey" -- yawn -- but Tim had fun skewering Armey for being rebuffed by Jimmy Buffett after requesting the use of a some for some upcoming campaign Armey is engaged in. Tim even went so far as to show a "Margaritaville" bumper sticker on Armey's car -- and given Dick's reputation for downing a few, no bumper sticker could be more appropriate.
Will GOPers embrace the Sarbanes bill? Armey said the House bill is better -- but never told us why.
We only caught a few minutes of the second half of MTP, in which Tim took on Vermont governor Howard Dean -- who is making a run for the 2004 presidential nomination.
Tim tried to nail Dean on a comment he made just after Sept. 11 that some right-wingers are trying to pawn off as "justifying" Al Qaeda's attacks on the US -- but Dean turned Timmy's attack upside down, blasting Smirk-o-lationism. When Tim hammered Dean on his comment about the disparity between the wealthy and poor and Osama being rich, Dean pointed out that poor Palestinian children dancing with glee over the deaths of thousands of Americans is a symptom of the failure of American foreign policy. Tim again tried to "prove" Dean had rationalized terrorists, and Dean again said that his point is that the base of support for terrorism must be destroyed -- and that means engagement.
A few minutes later, Tim asked Dean whether he would repeal the smirk tax cut -- and Dean gave a very detailed yes, detailing key exceptions that would benefit middle-income people and smaller businesses. Tim tried to say he would be raising taxes -- and Dean said that Americans would prefer his vision of real health coverage for all Americans at little cost.
Dean should have said that the tax cuts Smirk has championed have NOT been made permanent - but we're sure his people are going to point this out to him when they review the show. Dean was articulate, forceful and fast on his feet, and could prove to be a formidable candidate if he can find the money to run.
-- JJ Balzer
JJ Balzer is a former television news producer. He lives in New York City.
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ISSN No. 1523-1690