Flush twice... it's a long way to Sally Quinn's place!

Pundit Pap for June 1, 2003
But, but, but... Big Media is good for you!
By the Pundit Pap Team

June 1, 2003 -- WASHINGTON?NEW YORK (apj.us) -- We were expecting yet another morning of yet more public relations for the Smirk Junta disguised as "political discussion."

In one respect, we got it -- the issue of media consolidation was aggressively covered by the Sunday shows, who made damn sure that the official White House spin was front and center -- specifically, that the FCC rules for media ownership are anachronistic and in drastic need of revision

Translation: a media "gang of five" dominated by conservative-leaning companies (Disney, News Corporation, Viacom, Clear Channel, and GE) is good for you! You'll get plenty of diversity -- your choice of reading Bob Novak, listening to Rush Limbaugh or watching FAUX News Channel.

On the other hand, the opinion mandarins were more open than we had anticipated about Chimpy McSmirkster's credibility gap over those weapons of mass destruction (WMDs) as he undertakes a "diplomatic" tour of Europe and the Mideast. Now, we sort of suspect that the pundits may have some "inside dope" about an impending WMD find -- but then, it could end up being another case of those "biological weapons" trailers that, it turns out, may not have been intended for weapons use at all. On the other hand, it's becoming clear that the CIA had bad intelligence that made its way into policy decisions -- and you could see the opinion shapers steeling themselves for inevitable criticism from Democrats, particularly those with their eyes on getting the Texas Dauphin out of Al Gore's house.

We'll have to see how the story plays out.

And we were surprised to see that there was only passing mention of the arrest of American terrorist Eric Robert Rudolph yesterday, given the overkill coverage of his having been taken into custody yesterday. About the toughest description of him we heard was "serial bomber" and only passing mention that he targeted the Olympics and women's health centers, inevitably labeled "abortion clinics." There was only one passing mention of the other emerging story surrounding his capture: emerging evidence that he was shielded by a network of anti-reproductive-choice extremists and perhaps even white supremist and/or militia nuts.

But, to the surprising credit of the big broadcasters, there was overwhelming praise for the Jeffrey Postel, the rookie policeman in Murphy, North Carolina who took Rudolph into custody as part of his normal duties -- and no mention of Injustice Minister John "Ass-KKKroft" Ashcroft's cheap-shot attempt yesterday to give all credit for Rudolph's capture to the FBI and the DOJ.

Here's a quick look at what we caught:

ABC This Weak
The Players:
George Stephanopoulos, who, to our surprise, seems to be getting a bit more aggressive with the questions
Mike Powell, FCC Chairman and son of Colin you-know-who
Sen. John "JJ" McCain (R-AZ), no loyalist to the Boy King
Sen. Chris Dodd (D-CT), telegenic but a lot less liberal than he comes off on TV

This Weak made much of its interview with Mike Powell at the top of the broadcast -- but, expectedly, went first with the Rudolph story, touching on all the media-friendly questions (such as "Who helped Rudolph?" and "Who gets the reward?") without once uttering the word that best describes Rudolph: "terrorist."

Following a setup piece on media consolidation reported by Linda Douglass (a piece that pulled its punches -- and made much of fascist-leaner Rupert Murdoch being "attacked by Liberals" as if that were some sort of sin), Steph welcomed Mike Powell, and asked him not only about the thousands of letters the FCC has received decrying the FCC's pending decision to loosen media ownership guidelines but also about members of Congress who have asked for an additional 30 days to review the ramifications of such a rule change. Powell made it clear in unmistakable pundit-ese that Murdoch... er, Powell will get his way and the vote will happen tomorrow.

Steph suggested that the new rules were not in the public interest, and Powell gave his rote answer: the rules date back to the FDR era and we need rules that deal with the new reality (namely, that Murdoch and Clear Channel own Powell's ass along with those of the other bought-and-paid-for Republicans on the FCC). Powell also claimed that the new rules would allow for more variety of news (translation: more fascist-leaning outlets and a spectrum of views from moderate conservative to untra-fascist).

Steph asked how over-the-air TV, which is hurting, is helped by the new rules. Powell gave an incredulous nonsequitur of an answer in which he touched on ad revenues while acknowledging that cable is king (and ignoring the fact that many cable system owners also own television stations and cable-only channels).

Steph said a large number of groups oppose that changes -- and the FCC was only able to find 11 people outside the industry who like the rules! Powell then lied outright, saying he opposes consolidation (tee-hee -- yeah, right).

Steph said that in 1996, radio was deregulated, and Clear Channel has gone from owning 40 stations to 1200, homogenizing and de-individualizing the medium. Powell then admitted there is a problem, but stood his ground on the rule change. When Steph followed up by pointing out that people are losing their preferred outlets, Powell -- showing once again that he just doesn't care about the truth -- brushed it off, saying that the old rules no longer work, and too many people are complaining about consolidation.

Steph then turned to a Washington Post editorial by Ted Turner, who Steph said has done well under the current rules and will likely do better. n the editorial, Turner blasts the proposed rule changes, saying they will discourage entrepreneurs and open the door for large outlets to slant news coverage in their interests (a shame Steph didn't also quote former FCC Chairman Reed Hundt, who sounded off in Eric Boehlert's superb interview with Hundt in Friday's Salon), who was even more aggressive in his critique than Turner). Powell dismissed Turner's critique, but then admitted that FOX News Channel is slanted after claiming that people supposedly call for diverse and strong opinions, then complain when they get them. Powell said he hopes that the market moves toward the new model and a more diverse news industry pops up -- then, in a cynically ironic aside, called the rule changes "liberalization."

The entire interview was an exercise in hypocrisy -- but give the devil Powell his due. The man is thoroughly prepped and was fast on his feet, meeting Steph point for point with his carefully-prepared spin. Ari Fleischer could have learned a few things from Powell. Nonetheless, Powell betrayed his intent to push certain "bullet points" with his repetition of the "fact" that the rules date back to the Roosevelt years and people talk too much about consolidation.

Topic two: the European and peace summits and those pesky, elusive WMDs that have yet to turn up in Iraq. Steph asked John McCain what the Chimp-in-Chief needs to do to succeed. McCain took a withering double swipe at the Pretend-a-dent, saying he has set his expectations too high and has to reach out (read: compromise and learn to be a diplomat instead of a bully) and work hard on the problem (implication: Smirk is lazy and relies on his team of coaches and handlers to do the real work). Chris Dodd was even more explicit in his criticism, saying that Little George had neglected the Middle East -- and now he has to focus and appoint the best people to help him pull off an agreement. Steph suggested George Mitchell might be the man. At this point the mercurial McCain actually threw Chimpy a bone, saying the "victory" in Iraq was the reason that Mideast peace was back on track.

Steph said the "victory was clouded" by the failure to find WMDs -- and reminded McCain that he had predicted the US would find massive amounts. McCain admitted he was "disappointed" that not much has turned up (read: nothing has -- and if he's disappointed, imagine how Smirk, Rummy and The Wolfo-man must feel), but was happy to see 10- and 11-year-olds released from Saddam's prisons. (Translation: change the subject! change the subject! we liberated them from Saddam! mission accomplished!). Dodd said that Saddam did possess them at one time -- it is an "anomaly" that he did prove they were gone if he did destroy them, and we had been given intelligence that said he had them (c'mon, Chris -- a lot of that intelligence came from Ahmad Chalabi, and it's looking to be pretty bogus).

Steph then flashed a bit of a new US News story that suggests that false anti-Saddam intelligence was planted. McCain fell back on the old spin points: Saddam used nerve gas, he failed to comply with old inspections, and so on. Steph said that the Administration owes it to the nation to independently review the intelligence; McCain agreed, and Dodd added that time will have to be made, but he still feels Saddam should have been removed from power.

Steph said that there's pretty much nothing tying Al Qaeda to Saddam; Dodd talked about the invasion of Kuwait, Saddam's use of nerve gas, and the threat he posed in the region. McCain said Saddam had a record of "reigniting" his programs after saying he would not.

Steph then turned to the FCC rule changes. McCain said that while there is an argument for relaxation of rules, continued consolidation that puts people's information source 1200 miles away from where they live worries him -- and Congress could pass a law that modifies the FCC's decision. He added that he has to consider the matter and is not ready to act immediately. Dodd said he is not on the committee that oversees the FCC or broadcasting, but just cannot understand why more time is not being spent on the matter -- concentration of power is against the interest of the public, as is the loss of capable competition. McCain's final prediction: Congress would get more involved with the matter of media consolidation that they have been in his memory.

When Steph announced the coming round table -- including George Will -- we changed the channel.

And we're going to give it to you straight: Steph is asking more questions and speeding up the pace of the interview segments to a pace matched only by FOX News pundit Tony Snow. It looks as if he's starting to get it together as a serious interviewer, even if he does soft-pedal questions than make George the Lesser and His Evangelico-Military Circus look like the lying, corrupt, doctrinaire regressives they are.

Much has been made about This Weak's beleaguered ratings. It's now becoming clear that Steph is not the problem. And over the last few months, the guest roster has gotten far better -- often better than those on Meet the Press. If ABC wants to do something that will give the show a shot in the arm, they should eliminate the remaining problems with the show.

First, get rid of that pompous, inflated, hypocritical proto-elitist George Will altogether.

Second, jettison the "round table" and have regulars Fareed Zakaria, Michel Martin and a guest pundit join in the questioning in at least one segment.

Then, start another round of promoting the show -- to Tim Russert's target audience.

-- Morrie Friendly

Eat The Press
Players:
Tim Russert, poster child for journalistic corruption
Has-been right-wing moll Jeane Kirkpatrick
Diplomat George Mitchell

Tim Russert jumped directly into discussion of the coming Mideast summit with Mitchell and Kirkpatrick. Mitchell said that the Crawford Cowboy must make the point that life is unbearable for Israelis and Palestinians -- and must say he is committed to bringing peace to Israel and the Palestinians.

Tim asked Kirkpatrick if she thinks Palestinian Prime Minister Mahmoud Abbas can end suicide bombings; Kirkpatrick gave a mealy-mouthed, stammering and pessimistic answer, and said that she's sure Arafat has control over Hamas. Mitchell said that the two leaders are not fully capable of controlling all violence, just as Shrub cannot guarantee no violence in the US -- the problem is that Abu Mazan does not have complete authority to crack down.

Tim said that Sharon actually used the "occupation" word (note that this is a reference to Israeli settlements, not the military) -- and said that the settlements are bad for all parties concerned. Mitchell said that he felt it was inevitable for an Israeli PM to acknowledge the situation. What does it mean for settlements? Mitchell said some will be given up, but not all of them -- if you talk to the Camp David negotiators, settlements were not the sticking point, and illegal outposts can be settled by "consolidation and elimination." Kirkpatrick said she was a little surprised (she sounded disappointed) -- and gave the most stumbling, incoherent string of sentence fragments that was almost impossible to follow.

In fact, Kirkpatrick's appearance was nothing less than an acute embarrassment. There she was, trying to give an answer justifying Israel's position, but she sounded as if she were struggling for both words and ideas. She sounded scattered and confused. Even Tim seemed to notice that she was rambling and coming across as more than a little bit dotty.

Mitchell said it is important that Junior commit himself to peace in the region whether or not success is guaranteed, and again said life for both sides is unbearable and the only way out is a negotiated settlement. Tim said that Little George has vested the prestige of the Presidency in Mideast peace, but Kirkpatrick dismissed the notion (translation: God forbid he should fail, the GOP will lose the Jewish vote they are trying to court).

Tim changed the topic to WMDs as the causus belli in Iraq. Mitchell called the failure to locate them a "serious problem," and there are questions about the quality of the intelligence used to predicate military action -- the failure to turn up WMDs has hurt America's credibility, but on the other hand, Saddam's tyranny was a justification for removing him. Kirkpatrick said the WMD issue is and remains serious -- and our capacity to know the basic facts is pivotal to making cogent decisions about foreign policy. She said that at the end of Desert Storm, Saddam used poison gas on Kurds and we know it. Kirkpatrick then let this whopper fly: "This is a problem with dictators in closed states -- even they don't know what they have." Huh? She said she is certain that the CIA was "honest in their efforts."

Tim said that people will be challenging the credibility of what Chimp Administration officials say -- and Kirkpatrick said that they were justified in saying what they said based on what UN inspectors found.

The talk turned to rebuilding countries, Kirkpatrick acknowledged that it turns out to be far more difficult than anticipated, citing the mess in Afghanistan. Mitchell said that if the Son King claimed that the Tehran regime had WMDs, the world would be skeptical -- and often the caveats that come with intelligence are dropped when a political point or decision is being made. The result: the world is skeptical of us, and it is unrealistic for the entire Crawford Cadre to even consider action against Iran. Tim asked if Mitchell shares Kirkpatrick's concerns about rebuilding Afghanistan, and Mitchell said he does -- reconstruction and winning hearts and minds is in fact harder than modern military campaigns, and are much more expensive and extensive than we were prepared for.

Funny how the boys at 1600 seemed to gloss over this point before both the Afghanistan and Iraq quagmires -- and how the corporate media all but ignored Democrats who made that very same point.

We ignored the boring round table with the usual gang of incestuous Beltway journalists (Bob Novak, Bill Safire and Al Hunt) -- until they jumped all over Bill Clinton's comment earlier this week that the 22nd amendment (the one that imposes Presidential term limits) needs an overhaul. He made it clear that it would most likely not apply to him. The entire panel, including the usually sane Al Hunt, jumped all over the comment -- claiming, as if they have any clue what is going through Clinton's mind, that he is out to seek the limelight and that this somehow betrays a lust for power.

Well, here's the fact, readers: the only reason this comment garnered any press attention is that Clinton haters -- and that includes the porcine Russert -- are keen to turn any comment Clinton makes into some sort of indictment of his character. If we had anything approaching a fair and disinterested press, Clinton's comments would have been completely overshadowed by those of two Democratic Presidential candidates: Sen. Bob Kerry (D-MA), who has been lambasting Smirk's failed diplomacy and his seemingly interminable lust for alienating and isolating the United States, and Bob Graham, who has accused the Rove Administration of covering up events leading up to the attacks of September 11th, 2003. Both of these issues are far more vital than the Big Dog suggesting that the Constitution needs tweaking and that the best term limits are those imposed by the voters.

-- Morrie Friendly

C-SPAN2 Smackdown!
Al Franken beats up on poor Bill O-Lie-ly

It seems there was a major, live dustup between Al Franken and Bill O'Reilly yesterday afternoon on C-SPAN2. We missed the live fireworks -- but stayed up late last night for the rerun at midnight EDT.

The setting was a book fair in Los Angeles. The hostess and moderator was former California congressperson turned publishing player Pat Schroeder -- a gracious and very charming podium hostess. The guests were Molly Ivins, Bill O'Reilly, and Al Franken -- all plugging forthcoming books. Each got a slice of time to address the attendees -- and judging by the applause, a lot of O'Reilly's partisans showed up to cheer him on. Seems Al Franken had quite the following, too.

Molly talked a little about her new book -- but said more about her previous tome, "Shrub," which, she noted, turned out to be prescient in its forecasting the many nonsuccesses of His Fraudulence and his misadministration so far.

O'Reilly followed, and spent most of his time trying to convince viewers that he is "neither conservative nor liberal" but a "true independent" -- using some frankly questionable example to "prove" his point. He talked a good game about virtues, "principles" and "discipline" -- and how awful it is to have a government that just might help make your life even one iota easier. It sounded like a retread of his overrated and completely fixed FAUX News Channel prime-time "interview" program The O'Reilly Factor, a sham "political talk show" that is nothing more than a means for Rupert Murdoch, Roger Ailes and their conservative cronies to communicate the spin of the day.

Up to the podium came Franken, with the draft cover for his new book, "Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced View of the Right". He immediately pointed out that O'Reilly was among the many liars on the preliminary cover -- which elicited an angry scowl from O'Reilly, who was the frequent subject of cutaways during Franken's hilarious monologue. Billy-Bob's visage was frozen in the most p!ssed-off look we've yet seen from anyone on any flavor of C-SPAN. O'Reilly was also leaning away from Franken -- to the point where it appeared as if he might slip out of his seat at any moment.

Before Franken previewed his book, he said that "God, um, asked me to write this book because he's so p!ssed off at Bush" -- who was not picked by God "but by Clarence Thomas." The audience was laughing, and laughing loud.

Franken then started taking shots at his book's subjects. He said "Lies..." is a response to phonied-up tomes about alleged media bias by Bernie Goldberg and Ann Coulter. He slammed the myth of the media having a pro-liberal bias, citing the magazines that did not give in to Monica mania: "Sailing, "Grocer's Monthly", "Juggs", and "Big Butt." He slammed the lie about the Bush tax cut going to the most needy -- saying that Chimp Boy hasn't clue one anyway. He slammed the record of Bush Daddy and Junior on making jobs disappear, cracking wise that if Bushes had run the country since 1776, not one person would have worked. His impersonation of Cheney uncomfortably slipping the word "evildoers" into a speech was priceless. And he needled Richard Scaife about buying up Mona Charen's latest book in quantity "to use as mulch."

Franken was on a roll. And then he pulled out the strategic nuclear weapons.

First, he hilariously nailed Ann Coulter not only for deceptive "footnotes" (that are actually backnotes and often have nothing to do with the body of her book) and outright deceptive comments in her books, but for implying that she was a friend of Franken!

Then, he slammed -- in hilarious and extensive detail -- O'Reilly's repeated claim that his old show, A Current Affair, had won two Peabody Awards. It didn't. It turns out that it won two Polk Awards. He also skewered O'Reilly for not retracting anything, using the cover of "corrections" and "mistakes."

Then came an unexpected flourish from Franken: "We have been takin' it and takin' it on the left." Franken angrily blasted the lies of the right about the memorial for his friend Paul Wellstone. I have never heard Franken so outraged, earnest and emotional. "We're NOT going to sit for this anymore, we're NOT!"

Franken wrapped up, and O'Reilly chimed in, complaining "We're only supposed to go for fifteen minutes, this idiot goes thirty-five."

O'Reilly, it turns out, had LIED. According to my time-coded tape of the event, Franken went about five minutes over -- because, unlike O'Reilly, Franken was having to stop his comments because the audience was loving his schtick and laughing. O'Reilly, who I can only assume was incensed that an audience of mixed political views had warmed to Franken, started to whine about having "misspoke" about the Peabody -- and when Franken tried to correct him...

FRANKEN: No, no, no, no, no, that's not...
O'REILLY: HEY! SHADDAP! YA HAD YER THIRDYFIVE MINUTES!
FRANKEN: No, you shut up!
O'REILLY (turning red): SHUT!!! UP!!!
FRANKEN: This isn't your show, Bill! Bill, you can't...
O'REILLY: This is what this guy does! THIS IS WHAT HE DOES!

That's right Bill: Franken exposes you and people like you as the short-tempered, spiteful, mean-spirited, thin-skinned, petty, fraudulent, pedantic shills for fascism that you all are.

And he does it with a smile, and damn well.

In a final petty and shot at Franken, O'Reilly claimed that Franken "demonized" him. But Franken got the last word and turned the tables on Mister No-Spin, reminding O'Reilly that he kept claiming that "We" won the Polk twice -- the problem being that the awards were given after O'Reilly had left the show!

Game, set and match to Franken.

-- Gene Gaudette

Morrie Friendly gave up a career as a political consultant to become a management consultant and pseudonymous travel guide author. He retains close ties to top players in both the Democratic and Republican parties and lives with his dog in Georgetown.

Gene Gaudette is a media producer, marketing guru and publisher of American Politics Journal. He lives in New York.