Steve's Blackout News O' the Day
June 17, 2004 -- HOLLYWOOD (apj.us) -- Yet another group of audiotapes obtained by CBS News may offer proof that Enron energy traders helped bring on, and cash-in on, the Western power crisis. Make up your own mind.
A phone conversation somewhere between Los Angeles and Houston, July, 2000.
"Wassup down at the grid, bro"
"Nothin. Just f***ing with California, man. Wanna see something cool. Look outside your window."
"Hey, the lights just went out in Beverly Hills."
"Yeah. Lets see those rich b****es get liposuction in the dark. Watch this."
"The power just went down at Cedar Sinai Hospital."
"Cool, huh? We get bonuses for that one. Last night I was able to shut down a defibrillator at UCLA Cardiac Care from 1500 miles away."
"Wait. The hospital lights just went on."
"I know. Ill get someone on that right away.."
"F***ing sick people."
"I was just thinking. What if the Feds cap energy prices?"
(Pause, then hysterical laughter)
"Yeah. Thatll happen...when Cheney tells Waxman who was in his energy meetings."
"Wait a minute. What energy meetings?"
"No, I'm serious. Cheney? Waxman? What energy meetings?
"Oops. Forget I said that. The Enron time/space continuum is still in experimental stage.
"You know, he steals money from California to the tune of about a million."
"Will you rephrase that?"
"OK, he, um, illegally abrigates, sucking every possible penny from any and everyone in California no matter how poor, no matter how elderly, no matter how sick, to the tune of a million bucks or two a day."
"Better. Whos he?"
"Well...not Lay or Skilling...wink-wink."
"They make Halliburton business practices look legal."
(Pause. Hysterical laughter)
"Im only kidding."
"How can we get away with a f***ing mugging of a states treasury without someone getting wise? I mean, were stealing arent we?"
Stealing? Nah. Its f***ing capitalism, man. First we manipulate the energy flow, they start rolling black outs, prices go up and then we capitalize on it. Thats why they call it capitalism. Stealing is when you get caught."
"Look. Its all about denial. People say there might be a problem and we just deny it. Ooh, look. I just turned off all the street lights in Compton. BAM! Yeah! Y'see, people have faith in big business. We're like the rich uncle who you don't diss because you don't want to be written out of the will.
"But wont the Governor see through it?"
"Governor Gray Out? You think anyones going to listen to that stiff? The f***ing public is already blaming him for the shortage. Heh-heh. I said shortage. Youd have to have a f***ing movie star running before anyone in this state would pay attention to anything theyre saying in Sacramento.
"You mean, like Van Damme?
"Except for his womanizing and the fact that hes a foreigner who no one would understand."
"But what if f***ing talk radio ever finds out about this. Wont they sound the alarm, and kill the chances of W and his friends moving into1600 Pennsylvania? (Pause, then...hysterical laughter) Sorry. I couldnt keep a straight face."
"You think were ever gonna get caught?".
"No f***ing way, man. Were f***ing Enron. Big oil. They put us away, theyd have to put everyone who ever worked for an oil company. You know who that means. All we have to do is stonewall and aint no one gonna find out."
"(Chuckle) Unless we were being taped."
(Hysterical laughter, then:)
"Did you hear a click?..."
Federal investigators have stopped the release of additional Enron employee tapes, not because of they're finished, but because they've run out of "bleep machines."
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